DD age 8 possible ADHD. Advice please!

[ditsydots]

Hi, I'm new to this whole mumsnet thing but looking for advice as I'm getting to the end of my tether!
My 8 year old daughter is beautiful and bright but over the last few years I keep thinking she may possibly have ADHD.
I am not quick to diagnose her with such a thing but every symptom of this disorder on the NHS website fits her to a tee.
She has no concentration and has really struggled at school. She hates books even though I love to read to her and doing homework is an absolute battle. Her favourite hobby is cartwheeling around the living room, supermarket basically anywhere with open space. I tried putting her in gymnastics classes but she was the only child running riot while everyone was sat still in a circle. Anything that requires more than 5 minutes attention she gets frustrated with and says its boring. She talks excessively and over the top of other people's conversations. She is very forgetful and is constantly loses things. She is always getting up to random mischief and saying random and embarrassing things in front of anyone. This evening I came downstairs to my entire living room covered in Fairy liquid because she thought it would be fun idea to set up a skating rink.
Because she has fallen so far behind at school despite extra classes school have put her on the special needs register.
I'm just concerned that I am reading too much into things. There is a huge stigma attached to ADHD and at the moment people just think my daughter is a naughty child.
I am currently exhausted with it all. My son who is only 2 loves to read and play with toys for hours on end something my daughter has never done.
Any advice or tips on this would be greatly appreciated.

Hello Ditsy and welcome sorry you are having a difficult time with your dd. did she realize what she did with the fairy liquid was bad? what are school doing to support her needs? Are they getting Educational Psychologist on board? How far behind is she? Does she enjoy school? Get on with her peers? My advice would be to ask for a meeting with SENCO and class teacher to make sure they are identifying and addressing her needs. Sorry if you've done this. I would advise going to your GP and ask for referral to a Developmental Paediatrician. Sorry, more questions than answers. Stick around here there's a wealth of wisdom on here.

Hi Ditsy

Our son was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 8. It followed 3 years of me constantly being asked to "have a word" at the school gate, them telling me he was immature/naughty/attention seeking. Them telling me I was over-anxious as I kept insisting we were missing something...

He is now diagnosed with ADHD, hyper mobility, multiple tic syndrome and potentially dyspraxia.

My point is this: If you think there is a possibility of your DD having ADHD you have to keep pushing for help and assessment. DS is very bright but has fallen behind as he wasn't given the support he needed in KS1. Kids with ADHD can be really annoying and easy to just dismiss or write off and you have to make sure she gets the extra support and help and ACCEPTANCE she needs. DS spent three years being told off and punished every day for calling out and making noises, something he can't help doing unless support is in place.

Are you seeing the SENCO? What do school say? Are they supportive?

I read something on this board that really resonated with me when we were at the beginning of our struggle for assessment and were over concerned with "labelling". Another poster said that whether you have a diagnosis or not, your child will be labelled. You need to make sure that they have the right one. She was right and it is taking a long time for people to drop DS's label of naughty/bad/stupid/disobedient/horrendous. I see our diagnosis as a big stick that I get to hold and wave around threateningly. It has opened up possibilities and provided leverage. It has helped DS understand why he is what he is, why he feels what he does. It has also provided me with the opportunity to meet other ADHD parents and that has helped hugely. We have finally got a good level of support and an amazing teacher. It never stops being a fight for help though

ADDISS (ADHD/ADD charity) are very helpful and strong advocates.

Stay strong. Keep posting.

Don't worry about a label. Getting a diagnosis of ADHD is not giving dd something she doesn't have. If dd get a diagnosis of ADHD next year she is still exeactly the same girl is is in labeled today. If she has ADHD so was born that way. Diagnosis does not change her at all in any way. All it changes is her possibilities for the better.

I know it's not the same leuge at all but if you found a lump, would you ignore it as you didn't want to hear bad news? Would not hearing that news make it all ok? With knowledge comes power.

Hi everyone! Only just seen your replies. Thankyou so much for your understanding! Something I haven't come across much recently. School haven't been great to be honest. But I have kind of took matters into my own hands. I am considering moving school as currently the teachers have made her sit at the back of the class, miss playtime and also art class which she loves because she has fallen so behind with her reading and writing.Her confidence is quite low and she is pretty frustrated with everything. Her behaviour has gone drastically downhill at home in the last few months. I am also considering home educating as I can then give her the one to one that she needs. But I do work part time so this could be a problem. I have raided Holland and Barrett and bought lots of kids vitamins including zinc and omega 3! I'm taking each day as it comes and trying to stay calm and positive. I have a meeting with school again tomorrow so will keep you posted. But at the moment I am less than satisfied with the way they have dealt with my DD. If it does turn out she has ADHD I want to do everything I can to help her reach her potential without struggling too much. Just trying to figure out what makes her tick at the moment! Thanks again.

Hope you get on Ok with the senco tomorrow ditsy, I would recommend making some notes so that you dont get distracted and you get answers to all your questions.

If the senco offers to put anything into place to supoort your Dd follow the meeting up in writing to check that the things are being done.

I have made the mistake of not following things up when staff say they will do something and then I find out later that nothing has been done.

Good luck

How did it go today Ditsy?