Starting an incident diary?

[RevoltInParadise]

We have a diagnosis fir ds of ADHD and possible asd.

I have read that it is a good idea to start a diary if behaviours? Is this primarily so we can get support?

We were given the diagnosis and a follow up appointment in six months but I am no closer to knowing what we need to do from here.

I have asked the school for an iep but not sure if I should push for this? They said they would but I have heard nothing.

The main things I want help with us the bit wanting to go to school, for a number if reasons..he feels he doesn't learn anything ( high functioning) and he has no friends. Would I put these sorts of comments in the diary?

I also want help as he feels that he keeps it together in school but then explodes and takes it out in us at home when he gets in. He frequently lashes out at ds2 and hurts him. I obviously try to prevent this as much as possible! But a friend from my support group said not to include those incidents as as could see it as us not protecting ds2 and he could be taken away. :(

I really just want my kids to be happy and get the support we all need. Any ideas?

Ss could see it as, not as as! And obviously it is a diagnosis for not fir!

I suspect if he was better supported at school, he would be less likely to explode when he gets home

Can you make an appointment with the SENCO to discuss the IEP and any suggestions you have that have helped him before?

Also, sorry! For ages the school have been saying he doesn't present any issues but this was proven wrong when they submitted their conners report. I now tend to hear about incidents at school. Shall I add these in too? Stuff like detentions for tripping and pushing etc?

X posted! Thank you for the quick reply!

I suspect that as well tbh! I will approach the senco again after half term to discuss it. At the moment I am hoping down the bad patenting route and plugging him into the iPad so he doesn't stalk around the house bothering the others. I know if he had the iPad he will just tune out the world. :(

Thanks! Ok I will start One and add in this weeks incidents both here and at school. The teacher has told another parent that she is wary if the child development centre as they often see things that aren't there! I know she wasn't referring to ds and was probably saying that that particular bit had nothing to worry about but it was a shock to hear that feed back, ESP as this is a recent diagnosis for us ( think a matter if weeks not months)

We do glop and have a smack then head into homework but he has the rest if the afternoon to chill. He does two after school activities.

The school know how it impacts as apparently the teacher had a conversation with him ( that I didn't know about) about it not bring good to explode at me after school and she had seen first hand how tough he is with his siblings.

Good to hear the ss thing is crap!

Sorry I going on and on! I feel very isolated and misunderstood at the moment so this is my outlet!

Ds is eight.

Do the school have to provide a timetable? We took a pic of last years and the teacher went mad!

I have read through some of the resources my school uses for various children.

They include things like - a little sign the child can have on their desk to subtly signal if they need a bit of time out

Visual timetables

A prompt sheet for teachers of resources that might help their pupils

Ensuring teachers are communicating clearly - eg not giving long multiple instructions if they need extra time to process what they have been told.

Worksheets with extra prompts to help them plan their work

IEP sheets identifying the current targets, what is in place to help them achieve, a space to evaluate if they are working. (the general stuff for SMART targets basically)

Thanks for your responses! That looks like a good list mm, thank you!

Polter, some links would be great. I don't have the best relationship with the school and thought a diagnosis might help, which is has, a bit, but hearing the comment the teacher made...

I might come join you in the pub! ;)

Also, while your here, what's the honking about? :)

Keeping a diary may help you and the school to identify triggers - eg always difficult after PE because getting changed is difficult and increases anxiety.

Or often worse on a Tuesday because there is a different cover supervisor who doesn't do XYZ which he needs extra time with. And so on.

If you can identify some triggers you can start to see if any are avoidable. But school should be doing this with you.

Thank you for the links!

And I quickly scanned the honking one.....love it!!

'The teacher has told another parent that she is wary if the child development centre as they often see things that aren't there!'

Getting a diagnosis from CDC is normally a bit like milking a cat. A start could be using the ABC recording of behaviours:

Antecedents/ triggers, ie what was happening before
Behaviour-what happened exactly
Consequences, what the resulting impact/ what happened after?

It can build a picture, help to identify triggers and look for successful ways forward. Plus it has the advantage of being simple enough for anyone from a dinner lady, LSA or teacher to complete with little training to quickly note in the one book. School could look into the logistics.

That's helpful, thanks. So you think a book that goes back and forth to school? Or they have one and I have one?

Personally I think one is best as it's easier to track. But consider if you wish your child to see this book and be part of it, or if you think he may have a negative reaction to perceived monitoring. Then maybe two separate could be better.
Try a normal communication book for going between if this is the case, a 4:1 ration of positive to negative recordings will support a more positive self-image. There is a danger of focusing on the negative, rather than achievements, when in most cases a book could read 'shouted out in maths' when the child actually listened for the majority of the lesson before the behaviour occurred and that's simply not recorded at all. Can be a little soul-destroying if mis-handled.

Good points raised there ontheone book issue. (See my other thread!! )

I think I would have to go with two books, but then again the ratio of positives might be good for him.

I have working for a child at the moment three books, soundsa lot but isn't. ABC for home and school, which only see the light of day as a 'consequence' but it is a boring discussion and a good one plus a general small notebook which goes back and for which is largely full of good stuff (so it doesn't go in the bin on the way out...)