Ds sent home after scratching another child

[popgoestheweezel]

Ds (7) has been sent home today after scratching another child's face at lunchtime (he has dx of ASDS/PDA and ADHD, on school action plus with an IEP and school are planning on applying for a statement in the next few weeks).
I was called immediately at work and informed that I should come and collect him and take him home. He was waiting in reception when I arrived but he claimed to have no idea why I had come and asked if he was going to the doctor's.
A teacher (not his class teacher who was apparently not in school at the time) and LSA came to speak to us. They said that they had talked to the other child who had been scratched and his story was backed up by other children who were present at the time, the other child had come up to ds with two bats and banged them together near (but not overly near) ds. Ds had then scratched the child's face leaving marks and then run off to the cloakroom.
Ds is on a trial of fast-release methylphenidate at the moment and unaware of the incident the LSA went to look for ds to give him his medication (it is supposed to be given at the beginning of lunchtime with his food but apparently hadn't been given until then).
I'm not quite sure of the subsequent sequence of events but clearly the incident was reported and the decision was taken by the deputy head to send him home for the rest of the day. It seems that no one asked for ds' side of the story.
Tonight dd has told me that at morning break the child in question had been 'winding ds up' by repeatedly hitting him with a hula hoop. Dd and her friend had tried to get the hoop off the other child but he continued to wind ds up.
So, I collected him and asked for clarification on the exclusion. I was told he was not being excluded just 'being sent home for a cooling off period' and that it was for other children's safety.
Is this an appropriate way to have dealt with this kind of incident?

Hi pop, here is the ipsea guidance about sending home to "cool off":

www.glogster.com/ipsea/misconception-9/g-6ksobifosf8taq82apm3ka0

I would have thought that 'being sent home for a cooling off period' actually equates to an illegal exclusion, but I'm sure that others with better knowledge will be on here soon.

I would certainly be asking for a meeting with the SENCO/Head to discuss what happened and ask how they intend to ensure it doesn't happen again!

No, it is an illegal exclusion. School are not allowed to send a child home to cool off.

Exactly what I thought. I was put off because I directly said 'so he's being excluded then?' and was told by the teacher 'no'.

I've had the same thing said to me several times, popgoestheweasel. The problem being that, when you push the issue and say 'in that case I'm not taking him home', they immediately up the ante and end up excluding him 5 times a week (until I got fed up and removed him, which was, of course, exactly what they were hoping for ).

You make a good point there polter. There could be many interpretations of the events; school's one is that ds launched a totally unprovoked and vicious attack on an innocent bystander, an alternative might be that after repeatedly goading a disabled child, the bully got his just desserts. The truth is surely somewhere in between but unfortunately the school have neglected to ascertain everybody's version of events so we will never know.
Very disappointing not only for us but also for ds' Ct. she has put so much time and effort into helping ds engage with school and we had parent's eve yesterday where she told us just how pleased she is with is progress. I know if she'd been in school today this would never have happened.

We have written to the head tonight expressing our concerns, pointing out that it is illegal and asking what they're now going to do to prevent this happening again.

Amistillsexy, that sounds terrible.

I've been in a situation like this - ds with similar difficulties/diagnosis.
Boy had been goading ds (a regular thing) - ds pushed him to make him stop and a fight broke out. Ds was excluded and the other child wasn't
Not sure what your relationship with the HT is like Pop, but I found that as soon as we challenged school on some issues they really didn't like it.
I hope school take on board your concerns and it doesn't make things worse as happened with us

Oh, and my ds had a full statement so that doesn't necessarily make any difference either.

pop, we have had problems with other children deliberately winding ds up in school too. They know ds' reaction will be massive. Either they think it's funny to see him screaming and out of control, or they've worked out that it disrupts the whole class, especially if it gets to the point where the whole class has to be evacuated, or both. . It's such a sad moment, when you realise 6/7 yr olds are capable of that.

Sounds like a fight or flight response to me popthe fact he doesn't even remember speaks volumes, definitely an illegal exclusion. I would arrange a meeting to ask what can be put in place to help him at times like this given his Dx.

We had this in YR 2 with Ds it turned out he was getting no support at all during the day and it was all coming to a head after lunch time....of course I had it all wrong but a letter to the headteacher mentioning the incident and outlining my concerns seemed to put a stop to this and magically his physical aggression suddenly vanished.

Sorry just read you have already done that pop Doh!

No advice but absolutely disgusted the way your DS has been treated.
Why didn't school ask your DS what happened? And where was supervision?
Good luck.

Sadly this sounds all too familiar.
I am sorry your ds is going through this.

IF my DS hurt anyone he knew it was wrong and so admitted it without telling anyone the back story of why he did it.
I took to gathering DS's and anyone else's side of the story too, and e-mailing the head, SENCO and the class teacher with a
You told me this this and this happened ( facts only)
DS said that this happened because..... ( all the pre story)
DS's friend, DD saw xyz happen.
I think that you are being unfair as Child X was clearly provoking DS. You are aware that DS's Dx means that he may not be able to control his actions after continued provokation.
What steps are you putting in place to make sure that this cannot happen again, and also how is X going to be disciplined for his actions.
Please reply to me in writing by......

After a few of these sort of things, the head became very involved in the bullying that was going on ( sadly in DS's case it was!) and magically provision at break and lunchtimes improved immeasurably.

Good luck.

Had a meeting with the head and he has accepted that things didnt go as they should. We have asked that statement application be made highest priority now. Of course, ds has now had two terrible days at school- no surprise of course. We can't undo what's happened but what can we do to repair this damage?

You know that you can apply for a statutory assessment yourself? You don't have to wait for the school. You could even cite his illegal exclusion as a reason for requesting SA - the school clearly can't keep him or other children safe

Yes, but we were hoping to keep the school onside as much as possible. The school and ed psych and autism expert were all in agreement that it was next step . The head and class teacher have been amazingly supportive, the exclusion was on a day when neither were in, I'm sure it wouldn't have happened if either had been there.
There has been 'whole school awareness' but I think that on this occasion it's backfired and the fact that teacher's were aware of his disability made them actually discriminate against him and accept that it was entirely his fault before getting the full story.