ASD struggling at school

[Divinity]

My DS(7) has ASD. He's just transferred to the juniors from an infant school so he's been there less than a month. Academically my DS is very able in logical subjects and struggles with the more abstract ones. Any anxiety projects outwards so he can be disruptive (and soil himself) rather than introverted when upset.

I have heard nothing at all from the school since the start of term.

Last week my DS started to not want to go to school. He tells me two nights ago that another boy (who has serious challenging behaviour - don't know his diagnosis) has been seeking him out and hitting him in the playground and that DS had had two detentions the previous week but he didn't know what for. So I went to see the teacher to ask what was happening and if there was anything I could do to support her.

I didn't get to see the teacher, the head pulled me into her office instead and told me DS had been told off for climbing on tables. That she has had an autistic child in school before and that he only needs to tell a teacher if he has been hurt (something DS will struggle to do!).

I was not reassured by the meeting.

Then today I discover that my DS is routinely told off at breakfast club, often as soon as he walks in the door, and he's been very upset by this. Apparently DS was leaning over the table not climbing on it and the shouting he received was out of proportion. And when other boys mess about it's DS that gets the telling off and the detentions (there have been more than 2). DS is so anxious about it that he asked to change schools. This is shocking to me given how difficult he finds change.

I don't want to over react so am looking for objective thoughts. I'm unsure what to do next other than continue to go in and ask for feedback. I am prepared to change schools if necessary.

I would arrange a further meeting with the school Head and SENCO asap.

Junior school with all its unwritten social codes can be very harsh for those with additional needs when those needs are not being met.

I take it as a given that your DS does not have a statement of special needs in place for him (you do not mention such a document). I would also apply for a statement now from the LEA if there is no such document in place

Who told him off at breakfast club, a staff member?. They also seem unable and unwilling to make any reasonable adjustments as well.

It indeed sounds like his current school are both unwilling and unable to help your son. I would indeed be looking at other schools in your area now, they are certainly not wanting to hear his side of the story.

I have never applied for a statement but will look into it in the morning. Infant school was very good with him but the environment is more nurturing I guess. I've emailed partnership plus and a local charity asking for support and I will look into the statement tomorrow.

Glad I'm not over reacting and that others can see he needs more help.

I would ask for a meeting with his class teacher, head & senco.
Obviously there have been some issues & best that you work together to resolve them ;) .. in other words, get in there & kick arse!
Does he have any external support or are there any ASD support teachers attached to the LEA that can go in and advise the school, sound like they just don't get it!