Playground issues

[twainiac]

Hi ladies, this is my first post here - have been lurking for a while and found lots of posts very helpful.

My DS is 7 and undergoing assessment for ASD. Two paeds have acknowledged he has Social Communication problems, but both seem to think he does not tick enough boxes for a diagnosis. We will see......

Anyway, he has just gone into year 3, changing from an Infant School to a very large Junior School. Had a meeting with his class teacher and senco yesterday as we were worried how he was doing. Apparently he is fine at school, at home he says he hates it and doesn't want to go :-( However, my big worry now is that the senco referred to some playground incidences and then refused to tell us what happened. Basically I want to know if he has behaved aggressively, if he was bullied into this,or if it was a misunderstanding. The more I think about it, the more annoyed I am that she wouldn't tell us. Am I being unreasonable in wanting to know?

Thanks for any advice!

As a parent you have every right to know what goes on in school. I have worked in schools and although teachers don't phone parents up for every cross word said in the playground if an incident occurs that merits it being logged then the parents should know and the fact they hinted at something is quite unprofessional to be honest, either it's worth you knowing so they should tell the whole story or it was nothing and shouldn't have been mentioned at all.
I would ask to speak to them again, but make a list of what it is you would like to know first so you can ask them very clear and to the point questions. Hope you get it resolved

Thank you very much EnglishRose, very helpful. I appreciate that the school feel able to handle things without running to the parents, but to tell me 'something' happened but not 'what' seems a bit strange..... I will make an appointment to follow it up.

Thank you poltergoose. No, he has no support at school. He has just transferred to a large junior school, his infant school were great and did an iep for him and set up a play therapy group. He did have some play issues there, but they kept a close eye on him, did some assemblies and circle time work on playground rules and the last six months were trouble free.
I did think he may need some support at play times, but no idea how to go about getting it?
Thank you again x

Hmmm, maybe it's a case of seeing how he goes then. Perhaps if the problems continue they will do more to help.
Senco has told me he definitely won't get a statement ......

I think I will email the senco, whenever I speak to her she seems to be able to turn the agenda around to what she wants and I come away none the wiser. Time to become more assertive!
Thanks again for all the advice, without this forum I wouldn't have a clue!

If I had a £1 for every time I had read same from a SENCO I'd be quite rich by now.

No support either; they certainly threw him in at the deep end. As he is already being seen by paediatricians he should be on School Action Plus and have an IEP in place too.

He may well be bottling up all the frustrations of the school day only to take it out on you when he gets home. That type of scenario often happens when the child's additional needs at school are simply not being met.

My friend's child was failed at junior school by a SENCO who originally uttered such a baseless pronouncement. I would not want anyone to meet that same fate.

I would apply to the LEA now for a Statement, IPSEA's website are very good if you are wondering what to write:-

www.ipsea.org.uk

twiniac

You are fast learning, you are coming to the harsh realisation that YOU are his best - and only - advocate.

Thank you Attila, I am scared of failing him myself. I know I need to be a bit more proactive now!

He has a couple of paed appointments coming up and two assessments in school by two different teams, so I will wait to see the outcome of those and then perhaps apply for a statement. Even if all it achieves is giving the school a bit of a nudge in the right direction .....

Thanks all for the advice x

Polter, thank you - I would love to stick around :-)

Re DLA, I have read about it but not sure that he really requires much more care than a NT child....

Attila, please can you explain why you think he should automatically be on school action plus with an IEP in place? It's just that I've had a snotty response from senco, and need to know a few facts...... Thank you x

twainiac When outside agencies are involved with a Dc the should be put on SA+ e.g my Dd started seeing a NHS speech and language therapist (referred at her 3 yr check by health visitor after I voiced my concerns) and both myself and school were given a program to work on with her which instantly put her onto school action plus with an IEP.

Hi twiniac,

Exactly what okthatsweird stated (have only just read your latest message re SA plus).

TBH I would not wait until these other two teams have been in before applying for the statement document. This is also because it can take upwards of six months to set up after applying for such a thing.

Do stick around here, knowledge after all is POWER!!!.

@ Attila

Do stick around here, knowledge after all is POWER!!!

you forgot your evvvviiillll laugh

Thank you all, sorry for being dim, but the outside agencies involved are the ASD assessment team (including paed) and the Social Communication Team who have just assessed his needs in school. Does this count? The lady from Social Communication team will be sending a report and recommendations to school today.
I spoke to the lady on the phone today, and it was so nice to talk to someone who could totally see what I see!
Sorry for the questions again, but I feel I need to know exactly where I stand or senco will wipe the floor with me :-/