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It's all gone wrong again - urgent hand holding & support needed

6 replies

LargeLatte · 18/09/2013 10:27

I've made such a mess of all of this.

ds1 (8) always been a difficult child I have been on this board so many times asking for support.

This year it reached crisis point - he was having panic attacks, physically and verbally attacking his little brother constantly, saying he wished he was dead, threatened to get a knife and stab me if I didn't do what he said.

Met with school, they put support in place for drop off and assemblies - times of stress, and acknowledged he had a personality clash with his teacher.

Saw CAHMS who suggested Aspergers, then sent a questionnaire out, to which 90% of the answers are 'no' so it doesn't look like that is the right dx, although other parents of children with Aspergers have said they thought he had it too.

School holidays came, 2 weeks in I dropped some of his asthma meds and he became a completely different child. Relaxed, happy, kind cooperative.

Saw dr, changed meds 2 weeks ago. Back at school three weeks, back to being anxious, unkind, attacking brother, last night said he want to be dead, this morning ran away because we couldn't find his coat.

I broke down at school today because of the stress.

They are having a meeting with all adults involved with him at school, and I am going back in later to discuss a plan.

How can one child have 2 distinct personalities. Why is he switching between the two? I would describe him as slipping into a depression - anxious, angry, unhappy, very very low self esteem which he takes out on his brother.

He has had such a bad run of teachers at that school, which was put in Special Measures. He was in classes that were physically unsafe for him. He was ignored when he couldn't do the work. The school on the whole is so much better, there is just one teacher left that everyone wants to avoid....ds's teacher.

Don't even know why I am posting. Mourning for the beautiful little boy I had this summer, and scared of the angry spite-filled wasp that will be returned to me at the end of the day, and sad for ds1 who is locked into this.

OP posts:
okthatsweird · 18/09/2013 10:42

Sounds like you are both having a tough time of it at the moment. Is he still under CAMHS Large? What questionnaire was it? Who said the Dx was wrong?

If the school have acknowleged a personality clash with the teacher which is causing some anxiety have they suggested moving him to another class?

2boysnamedR · 18/09/2013 10:47

Sounds like a very hard time for you. Having there ting sounds like a place to start collecting evidence to go back to the health bods with for everything to be looked into again

okthatsweird · 18/09/2013 10:48

Sorry just re-read your post. So the school he is at was put in special measures, but is better now. All other teacher ignored and didn't support. There is no other teacher whose class he can be moved into but the one he has a personality clash with?

If I read that right move him, this school isn't right for him.

OneInEight · 18/09/2013 11:10

Looking at your message could be (a) School or (b) the medicine that is causing the problems. You don't know which because both were changed at the same time. Is it possible to take your son back off the med's and see if there is an improvement again? Totally different but dh kept being given blood pressure tablets which made him bad-tempered but the GP took some convincing as it wasn't on the known list of side effects. So medicines can have this sort of side-effect.

Did school fill out the questionnaire too? Sometimes they see things that we as parents are too blinkered or accept as normal because we don't have enough experience of other children. Certainly true in our case as school saw problems and behaviours long before we did.

PolterGoose · 18/09/2013 11:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tambaboy · 18/09/2013 23:29

I guess it was this questionnaire
www.ahorangi.com/disability-help-guides/australian-scale-for-aspergers-syndrome.html

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