ds trashed the classroom yesterday....

[Eulalia]

Well not quite but I was called in as he was throwing a constuction kit (like large Lego/Mechano) around the classroom, and as I entered the school the classroom teacher and head were all but cowering outside the door with him shut in alone crashing about.

Of course it should never have got to that stage but the teachers said "we can't touch him". He was a bit unwell (I probably shouldn't have let him go to school but didn't realise) and also short of sleep (got up early for once that morning and isn't going to bed till 10/10.30pm at the moment)

Both the teacher and head are temporary due to staff sickness and ironically his temp teacher normally works at a school with a special needs unit but she seems afraid of him if anything. ds isn't getting on well with her and has been a bit disruptive prior to this incident.

Just wondered what experience anyone else had of this kind of thing. what happens if your child has a meltdown at school - do they deal with it or phone you up, can they touch the child if they get bad?

ds1 is 6 nearly 7 by the way with autism and is at mainstream and this incident happened at the end of the school day so the classroom was empty. I just feel a bit like they copped out by phoning me but maybe I am expecting too much of them. Its the first time he's ever done anything like this at school.

What do you mean they can't touch him? Is that policy? Surely staff working with kids with sns have to be trained in how to safely restrain a child of that age (but what do I know). From how you describe it he could've really hurt himself. Must've been awful. Did you manage to calm him down?

My ds sometimes kicks off like this in class and I've not yet been called in over it, he's in mainstream too. Although one day I had to pick him up early for a doctors appt, and came across his teacher restraining him in the playground, she stood behind him whilst wrapping her arms around his chest until she calmed him down, which she in fact did. It was difficult to watch him being restrained like this and I've got to admit I was abit shocked but when he's having one of his meltdowns I can't see what other option they've got, it must have been really upsetting for you to watch your ds thrash around in the room on his own like that, I think I would have found that far more upsetting

He's been quite disruptive at home recently although not to that extent so no it didn't really upset me (got hardened I suppose over the years) He will tend to sometimes throw things around aimlessly at home but has always been very good at school so am puzzled by this outburst. I don;t think he was being destructive as it was centred on the one thing (rather than random stuff) and after I went in he soon changed and started building the kit up!

Regarding restraint, the teacher told me that they aren't trained to handle him physically but they are going on a 'Calm' course but it doesn't start till September and even then they still aren't allowed to actually touch him. I am confused but I guess its a way of calming kids down without physical intervention. ds has already elbowed the temp teacher in the stomach when she crowded him and I get the feeling they don't want to go near him!

At least next term his normal teacher will be back and we only have 7 days left of this term. Don't know whether I am or about that!!

Well it happened again today and once again they phoned me. This time however he was OK by the time I got there. But he had been worse as they removed the construction kit and then he moved on to just chucking anything he could get his hands on. Also they said that he was making a deliberate aim to try and hit the teacher and head. At this point the other children had gone for a music lesson. However the thing is if he does this agian they said they would have to take all the children out of the classroom and leave him in there alone (like some sort of caged lion!). Seems crazy that they can't move him. One problem is that there is no area to take him to where he could calm down. Basically its just a two classroom school with a tiny cloakroom.

Sorry I am waffling on.... just looking for tips on how to deal with this. Problem is he doesn't want to learn that he is rewarded for this behaviour by me appearing to take him home.

Thanks cat64 - he was much better today, no further outburst thankfully and I think he is over his illness.

we have just started a procedure - which is new and attached to the new Support for Learning Bill, am not sure if this is Uk wide (we are in Scotland) but it basically is a bit like a Record of Needs and doesn't actually do anything. They've requested more support which is fine and hopefully it will be in place for next term. As there is only one week left of the term here nothing is going to happen before then, I just hope he's OK for Sports Day Monday and also school trip Tuesday.

I don't think he'd take to being restrained at all and would lash out. Only way is to anticipate the meltdown. I just hope this isn;t a new thing related to his age and his development and awareness of the world in general. Thankfully his normal teacher will be back at the start of the next term.

It seems strange that they would call you in rather than deal with it themselves. I know they were only temporary staff but still...

FWIW it could just be because it's the end of term and he's generally tired. That's usually a trigger for my ds2 to 'explode'.

Whatever the reason it sounds as though the school needs to draw up a plan of action to deal with the behaviour. They can't keep relying on you to sort it all out for them.

Coppertop - the prob seems to lie from the fact that there is no quiet area for him to go to. I agree a plan of action needs to be drawn up in case it happens again. I really don't want him to have to change schools but will if necessary. I just hope it was a one off / or rather 'two off' incident. Am dreading the school trip on Tue as it involves going to the beach - just hope he doesn't run away!