Ds (ASD) is just about to start YR1 in MS. He has 15 hours of funded support, no statement.
School is generally great at keeping me in the loop with communication and half termly regular meeting with me. Last meeting we had was his transition meeting and there were no less than 6 members of staff there (including deputy head) plus inclusion support specialist teacher from the LA.
There is definitely an air of apprehension from the school towards me (I didn't realise I was such a force to be reckoned with) and they fall over themselves to tell me what they believe I want to hear and give me the impression that ds is high on their list of priorities. However I've staged managed enough meeting of my own in previous career to know when this is happening to me and frankly his TA is probably the only one who I trust, she is absolutely fab, has a child with ADHD (grown up) so knows how to get the best out of ds and has really tried to understand him
School tell me he is doing great but I don't agree, as we now have a child who's anxiety levels regarding school have gone through the roof and his self esteem has gone through the floor (ds is a stupid boy is a staple phrase). He can barely write his name without outburst of anxiety and is more often than not obviously agitated and anxious when asked to do any kind of work independently. His end of year report made no mention of anything negative, in fact in showed a child that I do not recognise. I do however appreciate he has fared better than I had anticipated, but the routine suits him but he has developed a very real fear of the teachers (example being that if he does something inappropriate out of school, he instantly says, don't tell Miss R, whilst saying sorry over and over whilst escalating in volume and intensity). This tells me that he is expected to conform at all cost regardless of his Autism. At home we are certainly not soft on him but have learned strategies that work so have fewer outburst than we used too, but he's definitely not afraid of us in the same way.
Now here's the final straw... I have been given information from someone (colleague from years back) who was at a meeting (not related to ds) in school where the deputy head said that my ds isn't "as bad" as she had been led to believe. She was also questioning what line of work I am in as "I knew too much". Other things were said regarding ds and me. Obviously I am not going to challenge deputy head as I wouldn't betray the person who gave me the information in confidence, but the whole episode has seriously jaded my view of school.
Having thought about this over the break I have decided that since they feel ds is not as adversely affected by his ASD as he obviously is, they won't be supporting him adequately. I have decided to step up the pressure on school and start to build evidence of this.
This is where I'm desperately needing advise... what type of evidence should I be collating to start to build a picture that he is not being supported. I appreciate I can apply for SA, but want to get some evidence under my belt before doing so.