Since recent unsatisfactory/inconclusive private ASD assessment of dd2 (impaired, every day, significantly, but not bad enough for formal dx, ie not quite normal but not ASD) I have been trying hard to just relax and treat my dd2 as NT as possible, trying not to pathologise her and trying not to drive myself mad.
As it's the hols I've been happy pootling along, we have had a fairly quiet time with no big demands or overstimulation. This week I've been working and dd2 has been with friends, some of whom have had other kids around. dd2 finds this really really hard (socialising with more than one child), draining and often melts down big time afterwards. Said 'inconclusive' report acknowledges this.
This week dd2's behaviour has gone rapidly downhill as a result of this socialising. She had one meltdown at a friend's yesterday then when dd2 came home the wheels really came off. I have not seen dd2 this bad before. Far more extreme and explosive and more irate and completely imovable and set off by so a look or just the presence of another person in the room. dd2 feels completely ganged up on and stressed and like The World Is Just Not Fair. She seems almost frightened by it now. She actually asked last night if she could spend a day with me and nobody else, please.
Tried to get her to have a decent night's sleep, which she did. Woke up, wanted to paint nails, told clearly using simple language "we can do this but only if you get dressed now otherwise we will not have time". dd2 then got distracted, watched telly and had a further meltdown when I told her we no longer had time to paint nails (mum going to work).
She started ranting in incomplete bursts of irate phrases but was not making any semantic sense. It was literally dd2 expressing pure emotion but not being able to string an actual sentence together, merely half baked constructions and things like 'you wasted my time' etc, stuff with no relevance that didn't make sense. She was partly making bits up (what she said I said, bore no resemblence to reality). What I am seeing is my dd2 ramping up her behaviour and levels of distress. I can see a point when it will become unmanageable, where I will really run out of options. It feels like a car crash in extremely slow motion.
Do NT kids do this making-no-sense ranting? Is this not severe? Do I have some twisted and super-restricted idea of normal?
And breathe.......................... don't know what I want anyone to say, really, it just feels never ending, trying to feel reassured there is nothing wrong with her but only being able to keep up that facade for a short time 