This could be long, I'm afraid but I would really appreciate any advice as am stressed out.
DD is an appalling sleeper. She often is up between 1 and 4am singing bouncing and playing. She used to have night terrors,not so much now, but still cries for us in night sometimes if she needs nappy changed/duvet put back on etc.
We had 2 years of sleep counselling which helped with settling but they eventually gave up as they said that was just how she was and we had to just leave her to it unless she was upset.
Melatonin didn't work. She now has Phenergan to take twice a week which helps but doesn't stop her waking.
We live in a first floor flat.
We got an email from the upstairs landlord in March saying their tenants had complained about DD banging and crying. We apologised and said we were always up with DD when she cried (we have a baby monitor) were doing our best, but DD has severe delays (she is like a young toddler). We even sent a copy of paediatricians letter outlining her issues and saying she had a severe sleep problem.
DD's room is empty with nothing but beds. We can't sleep in with her as she then stays awake all night.
We also discovered DD was banging in her wardrobe sometimes and blocked it off. We basically stopped sleeping at all for half the night as we were so alert for any noise from DD. The tenants said they had not realised DD's issues and understood we couldn't do much.
I thought it was over. In fact the tenants and their parents were exceedingly nice to us after that if we bumped into each other.
BUT..I was just checking an old email address that I have not used for ages..and found an email from landlord again dated May.
It basically said that the tenants had been disturbed 3 times by DD crying and it was "like a horror film" and had suggested to landlords they wouldn't be able to get tenants once they left.
Landlords said they knew we couldnt do anything more and DD 'couldn't help it' but they wanted to sell but were worried they'd have to declare the noise disagreement, so wanted to check if we fancied moving, since they thought we might prefer a house with a garden for DD. they said they 'knew this was a cheek'.
I was furious at them describing DDs noise as 'like a horror film' and basically telling us to move..although I do sympathise with them to sme degree and know they have a right to sleep.
But we are totally doing all we can. We can't afford to sell and buy a detached house here and are very settled here.
I also feel complaining about a child crying is somewhat OTT.
Apparently the landlord told DH recently they had only had one complaint of 'soft banging' recently. Which to me frankly seems a bit nippy. He said they are getting new tenants.
So far so good but I assume the new tenants will occupy the room above DD..at the moment no one does, so complaints may happen again.
My questions are..what else can we do?
What can they do to us? Police and council couldn't make DD quiet even if they tried. We are both owner occupies.
How bad could this get for us? Surely DD is protected slightly in law?
Am just worried for future. It's bad enough for us with DDs lack of sleep without the extra worry.
Any thoughts at all would be welcome.
Community nurse basically told us to tell them to get lost and buy a detached house if they don't like flat noise. But obviously that is way too harsh to say the least.
TIA