Has anyone else given up on the marital bed???

[jocook]

DD has never slept well though we have had small periods through her life (4.5) where she has slept typically for her age.
She has up to 9mg of melatonin a night which has really helped her relax and fall asleep but still gets up several times a night and bangs head off floor.
The nights she does sleep through she wakes very early....currently 4.30-5.
We often, prob half the week, end up sleeping in with her for part of the night which is what has prompted the post!
I went in to hb at 1ish this morning and stayed in with her and she has slept til 6.15 with no more hb.
Do I give up on the marital bed and co-sleep full time???

Im in with dd every night, it does help her to sleep a little better, shes 5 now. i ended up buying her a double bed for my comfort

Dh is fine with it.

Im in the pick your battles corner

How about trying a nickel bed tent. My son was up and down all night and in our bed before we got one. He loves it and doesn't bang his head anymore. I thought we would never get our bed back! We use it to travel too. My son still wakes early at five but he goes through till then now which is a vast improvement.

I would look at what's waking her up and find methods to help get her back to sleep. You may have set a pattern by sleeping in with her now, which can be quite difficult to undo.

My DS4 has always been a nightmare since a baby with sleep. We tried melatonin but it affected his anxieties. So I looked at alternatives. I put a mattress topper on his bed, a feather pillow and a light duvet with bedspreads. I also got rid of lots of distractions and put up black out curtains, kept his room cool and then looked at his bedtime routine. No tv after 6.30, bath, get dressed for bed, brush teeth, final trip to the loo and then bed. A kiss and closed the door. We also saw a chiropractor as I noticed that his shoulder was out - it turned out he had several vertebrae out or line inbetween his shoulders which is your sleep centre, plus his pelvis was twisted. A quick manipulation and he slept all night for the first time in his life. We now go back every 3-4 months to see our chiropractor lady and it has made a huge difference to our lives. We all sleep in our own beds

Thanks for the replies!
We dont as a rule sleep in with her....I was very much in the 'our bed is our bed!!!' camp until autism reared its head!!! And even then we always get in with her rather than let her in with us.
She doesnt seem aware weve got in with her so I hand on heart dont think its simply a seperation thing.
Really dont know what wakes her...she has a very constant bedtime routine though we have just introduced a massage which shes enjoying. Very dark room....always has had. Shes not distracted by anything (that im aware) she simply slides off the bed onto the floor (still asleep) and starts rocking banging her head.
We moved house 4 months ago which is when this spell kicked off....still hoping one night she'll just 'settle'!
Gonna look at getting her a new bed after pay day as we did buy a style over function one, which is a bit creaky!!
Gonna have a look at ebay now for a bed tent (makers are out of stock)...anythings worth a try!!!! : )

I have

My dd has co slept pretty much since birth so its a separation thing with her.

Dont have advice but fully sympathise with you

Well first night of operation co-sleep was an epic fail! Still up at 4.30. Feeling pretty fucking low today! : (

Can you look at getting a bed guard for her? It sounds like the rocking and head banging is a sort of self soothing behaviour, and she probably does want to go back to sleep. It's absolutely awful I know only too well. I was absolutely at my wits end with it, as DS4 shared with DS3 at the time. We decided to have a loft conversion built at considerable expense to give them all their own rooms. Then I remembered reading the following article and decided that as we had nothing to lose, I was going to follow the same path as Quentin Willson. here
Best £90 I've ever spent.

We recently had to get another new mattress for DD as she was having difficulties - she is soooo small and slight that she was finding the mattress too hard (despite a topper on it) and sleeping on top of the duvet every night.

So we got the softest mattress we could for the bed, put the topper back on again, and it seems to have helped a lot. I am looking at getting her a sleeping bag (she used to have the Grobags until she was about 3, and loved those, and still drags out the old basic camping bag we have on occasion - it comes out when she's having a bad time and stays out for a few weeks).

If she's in a room of her own, presumably the headbanging is some kind of sensory-seeking behaviour -0 would thre be some kind of light, mobile, or maybe podcast for ipod or similar that she could turn on herself that might help to give her the sensory input she's seeking? Maybe your clinic or consultant could help with that?