Pead Report should i write and clarify

[OMGGG]

ive been posting a lot lately so apologies...

ive received a report from paed and one paragraph is causing me concern, am i being over sensitive?

it writes....
we agreed that DS would complete a task and recieive a hug and a well done from his mother. in return she would do the same, so thst DS has the opportunity to givr her a hig on occasion to.
we discussed that DS is possibly trying to excert an element of control over his home environment, but currently only knows how to do this through challenging behaviour. he therefore needs opportunities to be good and helpful, which are positively rewarding with parentsl warmth since at present the only reaction he gets is negative, because of his poor behaviour, which may further reduce self esteem and therefore tesult in further demands for attention.

now i may be being ridiculous but i al not happy about this part as DS is always given warmth and affection and more so because of the difficulties i know he has. i know he is not behaviouring like this because he is a naughty child and being delibrately aggressive so i dont trest him as if he is. i am firm, but i pick my battles as some are not worth the fight. his behavioir stems from frustration and his difficulty to express his feelings and having to switch from one task to another ie stopping doing lego and eating dinner, going to bed etc.
i play classical music to cslm him use reward charts reassure him hug him tight and lots of praise.

should i write to clarify this or leave it. i get the deeling from appointments with her thst she thinks im a crap mum and its not true.

paed doesnt seem to be accepting private dx since her chat with senco-she was fine before that i swear.

senco disagrees with private dx too - senco is actually useless though to be fair. however they are not seeing anything wrong at school. ds behaves well. school hate sen- no word of a lie

also just to add i told private dx guys about paed not agreeing and they told me to seek rederral to gosh - theybdeal with more complex cases and are experts.

i

paed is very unlikely to see fault with professor skuse he is a bigwig with autism esp hfa

That sounds sensible OMGGG to wait and see how the NHS assessment goes first.

We had a very good experience of the child development team and it was a multidisciplinary approach, so our paed was part of it, but not the only person. Specialist ASD SALT was the person who did the assessment and he really knew his stuff. We were allowed to observe through a one way mirror, his testing made it very clear and obvious to anyone observing, even me, that ds def had ASD. So any doubts were gone.

I was in a similar position to you, school saying no difficulties, other paeds had said not ASD, no dx, even I wasn't 100% sure. After his assessment it was as plain as the nose on your face and all doubts were gone.

Good luck

thanks Claw. amazingly school are now helping.
they have made a nice transistion book for ds and his iep is looking good. also they are going to do social stories with him and the TA is going to hovver so she is easily accessible to ds. it might not sound like much but im thrilled they are finally taking it seriously.
my little ds asked me if he had school tomortow before he went to bed , i told him it was his last day till break up but he cried and said he needed a break. poor thing.

im going to write to paed about the report stating that the bit about ds only getting a negative reaction is wrong and politely explain why.
take care, thank you

That's good, it makes all the difference if you can get school onboard, you can do it without them, I did, but it really helps if you can. Maybe once they start paying more attention to your ds, they too will see some of the difficulties.

It is really common for kids to be able to hold it together in school, but the consequences are different behaviour at home, where they feel most relaxed and safe. So school see one child, you see a totally different one.

My ds held it together for 4 years, then self harmed at home. All the signs were there, school were just too inexperienced to see them. Then when I started pointed it out, they thought I was a loon. The holding it together for ds, resulted in a mental break down eventually.

Bear in mind too when writing professionals are never 'wrong' (they don't like that word!) the comment is 'inaccurate'!

thanks claw. im sorry to hear about your ds's struggles, its all very hard in so many ways.
im going to get the reply of tomorrow if i get a moments peace from ds x