I have been so brave but help me hold my nerve please

[insanityscratching]

Yesterday I waved dd aged 10 ASD off on the school residential until Friday. I even managed not to cry (last short residential ended up with me sobbing on teacher's shoulder as the bus left ) I've not text HT for an update either so I'm getting better.
But my nerves are frayed, the house is so quiet, ds3 is agitated because he has separation anxiety and the older ones are complaining of it being boring without her home to liven things up. I feel it will be a very long week.
The school is brilliant, they got extra funding to give her more support, they have considered all aspects so as they can preempt any difficulties and I do trust them to care for her well..... it's just they won't do it like I do it and that makes me anxious for her.
So I need stories of others' residential successes, tips on how to make the week go faster and ideas for a welcome home present for when she gets home.

DS1 (12) started OCC boarding a month or so ago. I vacillate between feeling partially bereaved (bursting into tears on the school-run because he was not there and LMFAO was on the radio) and guilty that I have not actively missed him every second of the day or have even (shame ) found myself enjoying the peace and calm.

I don't have any tips really as this is not a one off but is the new reality for the family. I want DS1 to embrace the lifeline he has been thrown (not that he would consider my feelings anyway!) so I hide how much doing the right thing can hurt.

He loves it though and it was the right decision.

wow I left mine for 3 hours today at a holiday programme for the first time (he is 8) and I nearly didn't cope with that let alone a residential!! I am well impressed. Despite ds wanting to go today I spent the whole time feeling guilty about leaving him there as I knew that there would be parts that he wouldn't cope with and unlike you the leaders were unknowns but did reassure me they had worked with children with similar needs before.

As it turned out it wasn't dreadful and he wants to go back... not entirely convinced the leaders were pleased to hear that they all looked like they needed a stiff drink but hopefully that wasn't just my boy causing that.
Anyway not much help for what you are actually after but dd and I did do a kickass afternoon tea for ds as his welcome home pressie maybe a bit lame for a 10 year old (my ds is very young for his chronological age)
Hope you both have a great experience this week and both grow in confidence at facing "the world"

Flyingboy. Loved being away and the staff always came back raving about how he was the politest child they had ever had and how amazing he was. In spain he talked round a kid who was terrified of the airport and sat with him, in Wales he climbed rock faces and canoed, in suffolk he acted a musical, inAustria he skiid and stayed upright and loved it and met girls! Recently he's had his final camping trip and had a fab time. It does them good to be away and makes them appreciate home more. The tenterhooks thing will have worn off by tomorrow evening. That said, I never did sleep properly when he did the French trip in year 6!!!!

Well I'm bearing up. Dd's only an hour away so flyingandflapping you have my utmost respect for your ds's Europe adventures. Dd will be a joy for her teachers, she always is, she got the award for best student last residential. I just miss her I think and I'm a control freak who finds it hard letting others take over. Mind you dh is taking all the others to a football match tonight so I might just enjoy having peace and quiet because it's never quiet when dd's home

DS2's school first took him on residential aged 6!! I was very very reluctant, but they firmly told me he'd be fine and that being cared for by other people is really really important (he was non verbal still at this point as well)...and of course they were right, he was fine and has been away every year since!! Had his final residential in May as he's off to a SN college course in september where they don't do them.

I always found HE was fine but I find it hard to let go of control! (having said that I'm still micro managing my NT children too so it may be me

Hope your DD has a fab time!

I sent Dd3 also 10 and also Asd off to cub camp a couple of weeks ago. I struggled to not text but I managed it It was the second time she had been away from home and the first time she hated it!

She had a fab time despite yak weather, she joined in with everything and even bought all her own clothes home!!

Are you impressed?? I certainly was

I hope your Dd has the time of her life and try to relax and maybe even enjoy your break