Feel like giving up! Salt

[2boysnamedR]

Hi girls, you might remember that my ds in reception is on school action plus for many delays - worst is speech and language. I put a formal complaint in when we was told salt would stop. Got the results for the complaint and it says he needs to go onto the school slt service as he doesn't meet the criteria for sen - even if he is on school action plus ( he also gets middle rate DLA ) so I don't get it. School action plus and DLA still means he has no specail educational needs? I am waiting on the results for his iep but if he is failing that I guess it still ok! Look your kid is at the bottom of the class he is a total failure in every aspect of life but that's ok. Piss off and enjoy your life together! Why the hell do I bover? Shall I wait until his next parents evening where they tell me he is failing and I just say 'sorry he is as thick as sh@t isn't he? Oh well who cares!'

I just want to cry. So no diagnosis, no statement, no specail needs either but paint me a black picture of his future and then walk away.

Also my baby is delayed and I get the 'he will be ok by the time he is x years old'

I can't do this any more. I think I should just accept there is no way to get help and just enjoy what he can do - like breath in and out and grow

I just want to cry for a month

2boys

I am so sorry you're being put through all this (((hugs))))).
Who did you complain to initially btw and how dare they fob you off so.

You can apply for the statement yourself; you do not need anyone's permission to do this. Make this application asap.

There are always people around here to hold your hand and IPSEA's website is very helpful in this regard www.ipsea.org.uk.

You are your child's best - and only - advocate here. You have seen that all too clearly. Do not give up, fight for your son and get angry with the naysayers.

I complained in writing to my nhs trust but they have outsourced to Virgin care. Just been to see the senco who said they will get all measures in place to get him seen by the school slt. ( this is the person who said he will never a statement). The latest salt report says his language is age appropriate by he has trouble with perception, word retrieval use of pronouns etc so it's fine but at the same it's not fine. He has a iep for his speech, but it's fine. He tried this week to jump out of a moving car, but it's fine, he pushed the baby legs up and behind his head till the baby screamed in pain but that's fine, he puts his hands over his ears when he flushes the loo, but that's fine, he lets his trousers fall down exposing his privates every day but that's fine. If I behaved like him I would be arrested but not to worry they are all fine by nine. Even the mentally disabled just wake up on a set day cured so no need for concern. Until the day he breaks the baby's back or gets run over from jumping out a moving car. Still that be fine as some kids are just naughty / stupid.

Really sorry you feel like this.
I'm an s/lt and I think most 'support' is woefully inadequate and little more than hot air and paper shuffling. I think your post sums the whole sorry situation very well.
You also sound exhausted and defeated.
I'd get onto some of the charities to get them to help you fight your corner.
It is very hard to take it all on alone. Afasic have really impressed me recently in this area.
Also IPSEA and ICAN.
It will still take a lot of time and energy but if you take the time to find out about these organisations, threy can help you.

Cerebra charity can provide £500 vouchers for private SLT for children with neurological conditions e.g. asd - not sure if there is a neurological basis here or not??

Caudwell can also provide grants for therapies

We got NHS SLT for 4 years and it was totally useless. Like you I fought for more but then wondered why I bothered as it was crap. Sadly SLTs like Moondog are the exception IME.

You can get a private SLT to do an assessment and short report for about £90 which may give you info to back you up. An ICAN assessment would be ideal but cost £1000s and I dont know how people get those funded.

Put in for statutory assessment yourself. Dont worry about proving if he meets the LA criteria for being sufficiently disabled - you can get a statement on the basis the school cannot meet need from its own resources. The school and NHS are clearly unable to meet his language needs from their own resources as they are unable to provide a SLT at all - so you need a statement for the LA to pay for private SLT which can meet need.

You will be turned down for SA probably and then you appeal and the burden of proof then turns so it is the LA that has to prove all your child's needs are being met.

Might you be eligible for legal aid? If so you can get legal aid to help with any appeal eg against refusal for statutory assessment and can then get reports funded using legal aid

Don't lose heart there is always another way.

Great advise above. Just wanted to add a note, definitely suggest you call the ICAN helpline....

It says on their website:

"Call 020 7843 2544 to arrange a free phone call from one of our speech and language therapists through the I CAN Help Enquiry Service or you can email your questions to [email protected]

Our DS had an ICAN 2 day assessment, it was excellent and we got an extensive report detailing all SLT needs. For us the LA paid for it, he ended up in an ICAN school in the adjacent county to where we live. I didn't think the assessment cost thousands as we did explore paying for it ourselves back in 2008 and I remember thinking we could just about pay if we needed to, but I guess the cost could have gone up over the years. I also remember ICAN saying the assessments are subsidised for parents on a sliding scale...so worth calling.

Thanks, just another really bad day. Thanks for the advice. I do wonder what I am fighting for. I have fought so hard to get here, but when I think of where that is, it's nowhere. Yes I'm in the system, but like being a lift that's broken - its still taking me no where so I might as well stand outside the broken lift.

If I carry on my futile fight with the nhs and la put go private (I was thinking mostly to get a proper answer for peace of mind ( ie my mental health)) what's the best type of private salt? Remembering he could have global delay / asd / dyspraxia / exactly like Einstein and just waiting to bloom? ( I have been told it can't be asd as he likes company and smiles but I'm not sure that's true)

I am so fed up of crying, so fed up of us being victims of the system. I just need to gain back done control, time is just wasting away

'so fed up of us being victims of the system. I just need to gain back done control, time is just wasting away'

It's totally vile and al living nightmare isn't it? I have been there myself and it was by far the worst experience of my life. Take a rest, regroup and systematically approach the people mentioned.
Afasic have done an amazing job recently with a family I know who are utterly demoralised and broken. They have lifted them up and taken on so many of their battles and given them strength.