How do you all cope with other people's attitudes?

[2boysnamedR]

Not in so much 'make your kid behave' but people ignoring what's going on. I know this is the least of my worrys but my mil didn't even flinch when I told her about ds. Either she was thinking that I'm wrong or maybe she geniunely doesn't care for him. My mums come up today, I am a mess and she is telling me about next doors cat. I think if they told me they had been told some thing non curable has been diagnosed with them I would at least say I was sorry, what's been happening? My mil was in tears to me saying my nephew had banged his head ( my toddler does that 20 times a day!) felt like screaming at her that her other son has just been labeled as having learning difficulties for life. But of course I had to do the 'oh dear poor him, poor you, how will ever carry on with life?'

I know a big part of this is me learning to adapt my life and way of thinking, but when will this get easier? When will I thoughen up? Is it better to pretend this isn't happening to them? But then they are telling ds to pull his pants up and stop whispering etc

I am learning so much on the plus side. Like no one is normal and maybe there is a reason mil has no empathy ( but she would cry about a asd on the telly, just not my son) and why my mum has to tell me 20 times in every conversation about how her neighbour can offord 100 cigs a day and martini but she's never worked! Lol! If they were my dd they would both be up for sen too!

Sometimes people are afraid to react at first and need time to digest. Very irritating though, esp with ils!

I can honestly say that , now my son (Asd, learning diffs) is 10, I care very much less what people think.

Sometimes I do think to myself: you would have had 17 nervous breakdowns if you had to cope with even half of what I do. But mostly I just think less of those who aren't nice, or empathetic.

It WILL get easier, promise.

It takes time to accept it yourself. You have to let go of your 'normal' ds and start to love and accept your 'new' ds. When I think back to when I finally got a diagnosis of CP and SLD for my ds I went through the stages of grief before accepting and celebrating the ds I had - it took years! It took the rest of the family a bit of time to adjust, too. It will get easier, 2boys (although maybe your mil will never get it...she sound batty).