I would stop, for at least two weeks, a month if possible, complete break, no mention, maybe after a week do running commentary on what your dd is doing, try and say to her when you think she might be straining/wriggling what is happening, keep it simple.
If she will come with you to the loo then before you go say that you need/use pecs if you can. Do a running commentary on your toilet trips too. Give her a treat for going to the loo with you, could be blowing bubbles, getting to play with a sensory toy on loo trips - but keep these things in the loo, or near her potty but out of reach. Chocolate star for sitting on potty, just to read a book, fully clothed if unwilling to sit without nappy.
I bought ds a series of toys, things he would really want, but lesser pocket money toys and sweets for starting - the big incentive toys were really cool things he would want but they went up on a shelf - for the first poo in the potty - for early success. Being outside in the garden made accidents less stressful for me. I also waited until I could let him be nappy free (warmish weather) and tried to catch pee/poo in the potty - he refused to use the toilet, it was too scary for him.
We had more than one potty, so we could get to it quickly. If he had pants on (we went nappy free except at night) and he had an accident (he was oblivious) I would talk about what he was doing in gentle voice/commentary - trying to make him aware.
Every time your dd gets upset back off, let it go, distract if you can.
Hth, ds has been tt for 5 yrs, but it was a very difficult time, I needed two weeks of no interruptions, hardly left the house, just to get started and it took about 7 months. We are in Scotland so he didn't start school until he was five, which took the pressure off, he is a toilet refuser still. Try and make sure you get a break in the evening it is exhausting.
If you use pecs then you could start having a simple daily visual timetable with toilet breaks included.