DS1 won't go into friend's house

[Jimjams]

I have a very good friend with an autistic dd. She's one of 2 people that I can visit and be at ease with, and in the holidays we see each other a lot. And to be honest we keep each other sane.

DS1 has been scared of her upstairs for a while now- we have no idea why. Now he won't go in her house. He has done this before in another friend's house when we lived in London (again got scared of her upstiars then refused to go to her house) but we moved before it was resolved.

I am so pissed off. I have a feeling we won't get him back inside the house for another 8 or 9 months at least (judging by the previous seaside fiasco). Ds2 loves playing with her ds as well so he's going to miss out as well. In fact we all are, and if I am stuck in the house with the pair of them for the entire school holidays I think I will end up mad.

There's no way we can meet elsewhere as we both need one adult per child. Anything less isn't safe.

Any ideas? This has totally thrown me. Final straw really - had a crap couple of weeks.

I hate f autism.

and the whole safety thing worries me - There are very few people that I would trust with ds1- they overestimate his understanding of danger. Also I've found that most people just can't stop using language -far too much language- and find it very unatural to cut it down.

Our ABA student was a pleasure to watch with him- she so obviously knew what she was doing......

.... and mine is SO physically able without the matching cognitive/communication level. Also quite impulsive so will just get up and leave or go to the loo!

hee hee my son takes himself to the loo, but can;t get himself dressed afterwards so he just appears in company naked from the waist down. That's the stage at which I can seperate out those who can cope with autism and those who can't

in a similar vein, DS1 has a total aversion (he just freaks out) about tissues and toilet paper - I think it must be a sensory thing - so visitors have to cope with him wiping his nose on his sleeve!

some progress. tried again today. Managed to march ds1 to the garden but then he ran out of the house screaming. So took him to the garden via the back gate and he stayed. He flipped every time the back door was opened but was happy to play in the garden. So I got my cup of tea with my friend - even though it was cold- and ds2 got to play with friend's ds (rolling round the garden).

Feel much happier now- the school holidays aren't quite so frightening!

Glad to hear some progress Jimjams. Wish we lived nearer and could be of some practical use to you during the Easter holidays.

Meant to ask - whereabouts in Ireland are you going in the summer? Just curious...

Northern dinosaur. Definitely Belfast possiby Port Ballantrae as well. Depends on how keen ds1 is to go into houses! I epxect we'll be taking trips to Lurgan as well.