Ds too anxious for his taster day at possible new school

[Icedcakeandflower]

Ds has AS and is Y5. He has a proposed statement and I need to name a new placement as his MS school have said they can't meet his needs.

After a long search, I've narrowed down to 2 possible special schools, and today was the taster day for one of them. Ds has had an anxiety attack and eventually promised to try again tomorrow.

Has anyone any suggestions as to what I can say/do to make it easier for him?

Do they have a website with photos of the school? Sometimes helps to be able to visualise the setting before you get there. Also talking through what will happen on your visit when you get there, who he will meet etc. Giving reassurance that he can cut the visit short and try again if it becomes overwhelming? If you have time, a test drive beforehand where you just do the journey and look at the school from the outside.

I don't think there are any easy answers - we went through similar with ds before his move to special school but he did get there in the end. good luck.

Thanks, pinkorkid . It's good to know your ds got there in the end!

He's already been for a quick tour and agreed to try a half day today. I could see the anxiety building up over the weekend and it all bubbled over today. I'm trying to be as reassuring and positive as possible. I really believe that once he gets there and has spent some time, it would be ok.

I do have an awful feeling of deja vu though. My dd went through something similar, and when she couldn't make her rearranged visit, that school decided they couldn't meet her needs. Hopefully this won't happen again!

I wonder if it would be useful to come up with some visual aids - guess what I'll be doing today

zzzzz, liking your suggestion . Biscuits are better than therapy!

Thanks everyone. I have offered to take ds for a drive there, and he likes the idea but not yet .

School have already lined up a buddy, and I'm prepared to stay for a while. So it looks like I've probably done all I can, and hope for the best!

Do you think half a day is too much too soon? When we visited ds1's new school they said they regularly have one or two pupils that start September in one hour increments to help them settle and they are willing to do whatever is needed - at the individual child's pace in order to make the placement work.

We do the little man thing on google maps when Dd3 is going somewhere new.
You can walk the little man along the street and turn him to look at the building.

I love zzzzz biscuits in the car idea too

Ds managed to go to the school car park this afternoon after it had closed. He seemed quite relaxed, so fingers crossed for tomorrow

Quick update - ds managed to go to the new school today and stayed till lunch (3.5 hours) .

I stayed, and at times he was anxious but he told the HT the school was very good . He said he has thought all schools were the same and horrible

Next step is for another visit.

Thanks for the helpful suggestions!

That's great news Iced. Hope he continues to gain confidence and learns to like school again.

That sounds really positive - well done to ds and to you for getting him there.

Glad you got him there iced and hope they can meet his needs so that he can be happy at school.

Good luck