Ds has just turned 6. I've always known he was 'different', not always in a negative way, sometimes in a fantastic way. My brother has aspergers, and we do/have both worked with adults and children with severe special needs. However ds isn't 'severe'.
He's very bright at science based subjects, has a great interest in the outdoors / nature / natural disasters. He's very loving, makes good eye contact if you get his attention and is a very cuddly boy. Yet to me he stands out like a sore thumb and the older he gets the more obvious it is becoming.
He gets fixated on things, such as water going down a drain, cars driving though puddles, insects moving, he will spend ages watching such events and it is very differcult to distract him when he is in this 'zone'. When excited he makes strange rigid, twisting shapes with his arms / upper body. He also flaps his arms in excitement. His attention span is very poor if he's not interested in whatever it is, however if he is interested in the topic he will pay excellent attention. He watches films he's interested in happily / can concentrate on computer games etc.
He seems very immature compared to his peers, it's like he's in his own little world. If you manage to draw him out of that world with something he's interested in, he's great, but as soon as he's not interested he goes back into his own world and doesn't appear to listen / hear. In group situations like football he doesn't appear to understand what is going on, you always need to explain thing to him 1:1 in a way which he understands, not everyone seems ble to do this. He's more than capable with most things but often doesn't seem to understand the instructions. I should mention that his school is taught in a different language to what we speak at home, but we have the same issues with both languages. He is fluent in both languages.
I've been to see his teacher a few times, I have been called in 4/5 times since September regarding his behaviour. His teacher says normally he's great but will sometimes lose it for no reason and become disruptive.. Theres quite a few kids in ds class with far more severe needs than my ds, they have lots of 1:1 etc so i think maybe shes comparing my ds to them. She has also noticed the lack of listening but thinks he's just a bit immature.
He's always had problems with his hearing with glue ear but had grommets last year and passed a hearing test and was discharged from ent I have asked for a referral back again due to lots of ear infections, but have been given a guideline of a 20 weeks for intial appointment. He is under care of an ot for hypermoblie hands as he struggles with fine motor skills but this is improving.
I have asked the teacher directly if she thinks he has asd/ADHD and she said she didn't know enough about it to say and suggested I speak to my hv? My gp is lovely and knows ds quite well but always says how well behaved he is, which he can be.
Anyway, sorry, this has been long. Dh has finally agreed with me that maybe we should get him assessed 'for peace of mind'. I'm delighted that he finally seems to realise that something isn't quite right but don't know where to go. I think his teacher thinks I'm a bit neuortic and I think his gp woud be very surprised to find we were having issues. Who do I approach? What do i say? What should i be asking for? Also as I'm not saying he needs any 1:1 support, just understanding I guess, shoud I be pushing to get him diasgonsed at all? It wouldn't really change anything would it? But I can only see things getting harder for him as he gets older and I think his 'differences' are going to become more apparent. Any help / advice / support appreciated, thanks for reading and sorry about the essay.