Autistic traits

[ScooseIsLoose]

Hi all this is my first time posting here I hope it's in the right topic. Basically I have a dd who is 31 months. I have always noticed she has a speech delay and have been on the waiting list for a speech and language assesment while now. We went for the appointment yesterday and the paediatrician basically asked us lots of questions and then held out a wooden block to dd expecting her to say the colour of it. When she didn't he said she is showing autistic traits. I just don't understand it at all that was his only interaction with her so its like he put two and two together and made 20! Has anyone else had experience
Of this? Or can you tell me if this sounds right? He has given us forms to full in for a speech and language referral and an m-chat form (which I
did online last night and she
only scored two) can anyone tell me what will happen next after I have sent these forms back as the doctor didnt actually tell me so I haven't a clue what is going to happen. Thank you.

In my experience, the paediatrician couldn't diagnose until she had been seeing my ds for 6 months (which in reality meant two appointments, six months apart). In the time between he was referred for OT, hearing and sight tests, and the paediatrician also sought the opinion of ds's nursery teacher. DS was already seeing a SALT.

We found following the Hanen programme / It takes Two to Talk was very helpful in terms of getting ds talking more. The approach made me feel that I was making a difference, and it was wonderful to finally get to know DS a little more. As for the ASD stuff, I read about it, a bit at a time, and thought about it, and looked at ds and thought some more. But I could only really deal with it once he had his diagnosis. Until then it was a strange mix of becoming more and more certain that it explained everything, and secretly hoping that I was wrong.

Seeing the SALT and getting the diagnosis were the two things that helped the most - improving his communication skills made a world of difference, day-to-day, and having an explanation for his behaviour (and some support) has helped hugely in the longer term.

I don't know if any of that is of any help, but I wish you well on this journey.

Also, the SALT had only spent 20 minutes with ds when she explained to me, ever so gently, that it wasn't that ds wasn't interacting with me because he couldn't talk, but the other way round. She didn't mention ASD, but it was the conclusion I came to after a few days. Being clued in from relatively early on in the process did help me cope with / understand the actual diagnosis.

Hi scoose. My ds was about the same age when I realized he had autism. He wasnt speaking but I wasn't too concerned initially because his big brother had a speech delay, but now talked.constantly!
However I went on Mumsnet & a speech therapist on here asked me if he was doing 3 key things. Did he respond to his name? Did he wave? Did he point? Sadly the answer to all of these was no. & that's when I began to realize there probably was something wrong.
To answer your initial query. We self referred to the speech therapy dept. at our local hospital. She saw ds & said she wanted to refer to the paediatrician for further investigation. (I think looking back, she probably knew right away, but where I live its supposed to be 3 professionals that assess & agree). So we went to see the paediatrician. She again said to us she couldn't give a diagnosis after 1 meeting & he would also have to be seen by the educational psychologist. However we pushed her for what she thought (by this time I had read a book about it (dr. Lorna Wing, I think) & was pretty sure ds had autism. She said she wouldn't be referring him for a special nursery placement if she didn't think he had autism. We still had to go through the assessment proceedure which took about 6 months & involved meetings with the speech therapist, educational psychologist & paediatrician, individually & group assessments.
Good luck OP. It's an emotional rollercoaster. For me I found it helpful to read up about it a bit.

But it's also true that paediatricians, educational psychologists and speech and language therapists sometimes overdiagnose (informally) autism as a way of explaining speech delays or delayed social skills.

The MCHAT is a good indicator of whether there's anything to be worried about - if your DD is interacting well with you and others and is communicating well non-verbally then I don't think you should be too concerned. Some great advice on encouraging talking too. I have a 3.5 yr old DD who was basically non-verbal at 30 months, but had a massive explosion of speech at 3 yrs and is getting better and better.

We were invited to an assessment by a speech and language therapist following DD's referral, then once they assessed her, we had a series of four one on one speech therapy sessions, then another course of PECS sessions about three months after that. SALT go into nursery to see DD and suggest things to the staff for encouraging talking. All that said, I think the most useful thing for DD has been being around other children and people and all of the damn books I've read on encouraging language!

My dc1 also had a speech delay - it did feel very different to dc2's. It is frustrating not to be able to get an instant ASD diagnosis, but on balance it was reassuring to only have the word 'autism' mentioned at the end of the process: no one would commit to it until the diagnosis was complete. But then again if I hadn't been expecting it I can see that it would have been a huge shock.

Read up as much as you can, keep an open mind, and work away at all those communication skills, OP, it is all that you can do* while you are waiting for the diagnosis process to complete. And it could just be a bit of a speech delay, it is hard when you just don't know at this stage.

*I bet now lots of people come on with incredibly helpful suggestions.

Thank you everyone for sharing your experiences I don't know anyone in rl who has gone through this so didnt know what to expect. We have a referral for a speech and language assessment and also an m-chat form to send off then we will go from there. She does communicate with us such as saying good morning and night night. She also makes good eye contact and is very affectionate. We just have to stay positive as I said to dh she hasn't been diagnosed with anything yet and if or when she does we will deal with it then. I will definitely order it takes two to talk thank you for the recommendation.

Nothing really to add, but can I second the Hanen recommendation? It's well worth the money and gives you something positive to be doing while you wait for appointments.

Thank you omi it's really knocked us for six I just don't know how the paed could even say autistic traits when he observed her for all of five minutes! We have an appointment with the gp booked for Wednesday and we are paying for a salt to come out on Monday as we want to get the ball rolling whilst we wait for an nhs appointment. We have done nothing but read up on autism for days although I do want to keep an open mind too as I know every child is different and there are a lot of the characteristics that she is not displaying. The main cause for concern is the lack of speech and pointing.

Whatever the end diagnosis, it's a bit of a rollercoaster from now on, I know. I really hope that you get some answers soon, and that the private SALT helps too. Get through each day, play with your dd and cuddle her lots - she's still your lovely baby. I always remember what a friend told me once: whatever you're worrying about today, in a year's time it won't be such a huge thing. I found the thought reassuring when stressing over things, and so far it has been true (of course, there's always something new...).

Hi just wanted to say that my daughter at 2.5 could say all the colours and alphabetic letter also counting and my sister daughter was 1 year older than mine and did not know lcolour etc.. Mine recently been assessed because she is hyper and my sister daughter is fine. So what I am trying to say is just by your child being not able to say colours does not mean anything. The thing is they need more to diagnose her children learn at different pace. Mine has no problems with learning and doing great at school but my sister one is a bit behind with learning but I have other issues she does not have.

Hi Stephanie that's the trouble dd does know her colours, alphabet, counts to 20 etc its just that she didn't answer the paed when asked yet she is showing some other traits but there are alot if traits such as lack of eye contact and responding to her own name that she doesn't possess. It's just a very confusing time and as much as we want to be educated I think you can drive yourself round the bend by reading too much. Thank you everybody