How can I teach ds to stop touching himself?

[ComeOnYouTwo]

So ds has develop this 'habit' of touching his willy when he is uneasy/stressed.
I have seen him doing that at home but also at a b'day party.

We've had the talk about touching your private parts only alone/in his bedroom but he says he can't help it. I think he might find that soothing (similar than other children rock or touch their hair perhaps?).

I feel that I really need to teach him to stop and at the same time, I am not sure how to do it if this is a coping mechanism.

ds is 8yo and is currently assessed for AS.

Any idea?

I try not to draw DS1's attention to what he actually is doing and simply ask him to behave in the way I want. He often gets a bit of a stiffy when he's over-excited, eg when I take him to the bathroom to clean his teeth (he does this very badly, himself, so we need to do it for him at least once a day) and he instantly starts to fiddle. I just gently remind him "hands by your side"

Being specific about what needs doing can be quite important. I've always found that "stop bouncing around" for example doesn't stop him from bouncing around, because he doesn't know what to do, instead, but "stand still, two feet on the ground" is more effective.

I have to say we usually just say 'Hands' with the occasional reminder 'You can only touch your willy when you are alone' type of thing.

No success yet and it has been going on for nearly 6 months.

Agree about being specific and to tell them what to do not what not to do. It makes a big difference.

The added problem is that now he gets cross when we say anything. It's met with 'I KNOOOW but I can't help it!!!'

I usually reply, "well if you want to be nagged..." :o

Stopping a rewarding behaviour is very hard. Converting it to something else works much better (nose picking? a pendant to fiddle with?)

Ouryve's phrases are great.