ADHD v immaturity - Help!

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DS2 (4) was asked to miss the last day of the holiday club last week due to his behaviour. The staff said it wasn't that he was willfully naughty but that he didn't listen and was very disruptive (especially with his brother who he tried to wind up/fight with etc). They said that when he was engaged he was fine but that the second something failed to hold his attention he was running around like a loon. I was asked if DS2 had ADHD and I had forgotten to put it on the form!

DS2 is a bit of a nightmare when it comes to listening. He simply doesn't listen! It's not that he can't hear (tested whispering sweets from the other side of the room!!) but just that he doesn't seem to proces what is being said if it doesn't suit him/engage him IYKWIM. DS2's teacher has spoken to me on several occasions about it and we have tried various methods which don't really seem to work. I've put his behaviour down to his age - he will be 5 at the end of April but am now wondering if there could be more to it. You know how it is, someone plants a seed and your brain starts going into overdrive!!!

I've googled symptoms of ADHD and he does seem to tick the boxes (but this could also be down to his age). He wakes up early every morning (5.30 - 6.00) and is on the go from the minute his eyes open - a bit like the duracell bunny when you put new batteries in!!

Do I go to the GP or wait & see? On the one hand, if DS2 is ADHD the earlier we know, the better we can deal with it but on the other hand I don't want to be one of these parents that needs a label to hide behind for poor behaviour. DS1 is being assessed for dyspraxia and I've already had comments from some parents at the school that I'm trying to find an excuse for his poor behaviour (he's only 6 but can have a melt down in class for perceived unfairness, plays up as an avoidance tactic for things like writing, sports etc).

Can anyone talk to me about ADHD and spotting symptoms? We had hoped DS2 would settle once he got to school but seems to be getting worse. I want to understand more about ADHD and monitor DS2 before I go to the GP.

Have a look at this

Thanks Handywoman. There's a lot there to get through. DS2 certainly does display a lot of the symptoms of hyperactivity and impulsivity, but they could also be down to his age.

I'm wary of trusting my judgement on this as a lot of DS1's dyspraxia symptoms I put down to the fact that kids develop differently etc. I didn't realise until someone pointed it out to me that DS1 had a lot of areas where he wasn't really where he ought to be that I started to join the dots...

At what age is it more likely to be ADHD than immaturity?

Hi, your son sounds very much like mine, although my ds is 5 and a half. We recently saw a paediatrician and spent a lot of time discussing adhd versus immaturity. He suggested that within a year the gap between my ds would either grow wider (leading to a diagnosis) or narrow. He felt that in bright children who can just about keep up with their peers, they tend to mask the symptoms. The problems arise when academically they start falling behind, they start to become socially excluded and finally their self esteem falls. We are keeping a very close on our ds, and thankfully have a super teacher who is doing the same.

I would suggest getting a referral. No one diagnosis adhd lightly and at least you can start to get help regardless of diagnosis.

Grrr - one of these parents who hides behind a label - sorry don't want to offer you any advice, learn by experience for yourself..........

Thanks Clare. I think I will speak to DS2's teacher this week and see what she thinks. She is an experienced reception teacher so should be able to advise on whether DS2 is typical for his age or if she has any concerns.

Wasuup - didn't mean to offend with the 'one of those parents' comment. It's something I'm worried I will be accused of doing if DS2 is diagnosed. I'm finding it tough coping with some of the snide comments being made because DS1 is being assessed for dyspraxia. I know another parent at school who was accused of getting her son diagnosed as dyslexic because she was too lazy to do his homework with him. I'm also worried about the negative press ADHD gets as DS2 is not an out of control child, just one who finds it difficult to stay focused, stay still & listen!