Please talk to me about school, recently diagnosed ASD

[LimboLil]

Hi, I have name changed yet again for this. My child has recently been dx with ASD and also has learning difficulties. He is currently in ms and has a lot of 1:1 support and we are in the process of getting a statement which I believe will be successful. When I met with the Ed Psychologist she suggested that I look at the local special school and a school with an ASD unit so I could see what was out there, which I am going to do. But I am torn. He has a lovely TA at the moment, his sibling attends the same school and I just cannot visualise myself putting him in a taxi and waving him off while I take my other child to the local school. It just feels like we would be shoving him out the way. But, of course I want to make the right decision. He does have behaviours that stand out and part of me thinks in special, this will be more accepted and he won't stand out as much. Things like school trips and plays etc would be more accessible to him, but they are not the be all and end all. The school with a unit is supposed to be excellent but it is much further away and I just think social isolation really, I would definitely need to use transport. I was put under pressure a bit by school a few months back to not, I believe, name them on the statement. I made a few phone calls to one of the SEN charities to get advice on this and updated them on the conversations and I have had no probs from school since and suddenly the support seems to be all singing all dancing. However, I do feel that the Ed Psych was dropping hints about moving him, I think they are not allowed to say outright. My gut feeling is that I want to keep him in ms for a bit longer and see how it goes, I think the pressure to move him was about what powers that be want but the staff on a day to day basis are lovely so I have no concerns that he is not supported properly.

Okay, breathe. All I really want advice on is anyone's experiences of ms, special, units. If you moved from one to the other and if so, when and how it worked out. If your child has anxiety issues did the move make them worse or less. That kind of thing :-)

Lil, I'm afraid I dont have any specific advice, although I did go through the same dance when my DS was diagnosed.
It's a tough call. I had good support from the SENCO when I was struggling with the decision (but that would not be everyone's experience).
Eventually, on balance, I decided to leave DS where he was. It has worked out well as the school have come up with the goods for him, every time we have hit a bump.
At the same time, I have left the door open in my head, in case things became too hard for him again.
A friend went through something similar and she moved her son to MS school that had a unit attached, as she felt the whole school atmosphere was different with SN children being so 'close' IYKWIM.

So, not much help I'm afraid. What would you ideally like for him, if you could snap your fingers?

Wow what would I like if I could snap my fingers! That could be a whole new thread. I guess for it not to be such a big deal that he has these difficulties. Regular visit from a SALT 1:1 and with TA. Education for him at his own pace. Education for those around him. To not feel paranoid that his school don't want him. That there isn't a need for special schools and that our children could go to school with their siblings locally but without it being detrimental to their education. Just a few off the top of my head!

I didnt mean for it to come out as quite such a stupid question; more to think about what are your priorities, as that might help you to make the decision IYSWIM. However, it really was a twat question as we would all like that, I think.

Sounds like you may be leaning towards the SS with those priorities; less about him fitting in and more about specialised ed/care?

Aw, it definitely was not a twat question! I think I am just going to have to get out there and visit and do pros and cons list. It's a bit of a head vs heart decision. I hate those!