Having a really down day today and feeling very anxious. Ds pead is observing him in nursery this afternoon and its been said several times that parents should not be there- I understand that but then I get drips of information from nursery staff about what was said etc etc and I end up getting really worked up and stressed. This is also the final bit before we get our diagnosis - suspected ASD.
Nursery seem to gloat and gloss over some of his issues by explaining it away as oh he is very tired that's why he has been screaming for the last 3 hrs, and oh his communication is really improving when its just copied speech or new lines from Peppa pig, they seem to be under the stupid impression that Ds having a hard time or not coping is a reflection of the skills of the staff so need to excuse it- by stating he is tired, not well, did not like messy play rather than actually he finds life bloody difficult and not knowing whats going to happen when or different staff being around not following the same procedures send him in to a frenzy.
I am just worried I guess that we are not going to get a DX and that its all in my head or my parenting and that I have exaggerated some of his issues, which was not helped by a new HV calling as she has seen DS file and coming out with stupid comments like I am sure normal parenting interventions would help.. He is only young you have a lot of time.. and I am starting to get really angry with people thinking they have all the answers, or that somehow I am not parenting my son the right way, or feeling they know DS without even meeting him, or at the moment nursery staff getting very excited about working with DS because they find ASD interesting and want to get in to that area of work.. I just want to shout at everyone that if they want to help they can bloody implement half the things the OT and salt suggested rather than talking to me about DS and his behaviour/Quirks.
I just hate the way I feel I am treated now because I am a mere parent who obviously knows nothing and never had a career or life before DC. I was in a respected career before DS and had close working relationships with many of the proffessionals who now have the power and my opinion was respected, listened to and acted upon. I now feel like everything I say has to be proved or disproved and nothing I say has much merit.
Just feeling a tad Fed up and pissed off with the whole process and peoples need to try have all the answers all the time.