Would you wear them?

[WillWeBeOk]

I've been posting about my baby who doesn't really give eye contact and I've had some great advice, thanks!

Now another question. Dd pays a lot more attention to objects than people (really worries me) and won't look at your face - unless you are wearing glasses! (Or have a tache - which I don't).

I'm a bit torn. She totally ignores me if I'm not wearing my glasses, which makes me feel rejected. She's all over me when I am wearing them, looking at my 'eyes', reaching out for my face, making noises etc. I am desperate for interaction but it feels fake as I know that she isn't actually interacting with 'me'. But would you say any interaction is better than none?

What would you do? Dd is 8 months old and increasingly not part of our world :(

I'd wear them I think. Get her used to interacting with you and then slowly remove them, bit at a time.

Can you try tickling her for eg. with them on and when she is really responding to the tickling and that is becoming the interaction rather than the glasses remove the glasses and continue tickling.

I am NO expert by that way, so may be completely wrong.

I agree, anything to connect looking at your face with pleasure. You can adapt later. Maybe try different things such as coloured contact lenses, stickers on your face, joke nose. Get her used to faces being a source of interest. Maybe even pulling lots of silly faces etc.

However, once again, I'm no expert. Just ideas.

Your daughter seems so much like mine. Yes I wear my glasses just to get eye contact.

Research about face processing suggests there's a visual problem in autism.

I would guess your glasses work like a picture frame, defining and highlighting your eyes and perhaps it's then easier for her to locate and focus on them.

Tiny children with visual issues (and they can be very subtle, affecting only certain types of visual input) are behaviourally similar in some ways to infants who go on to get ASD diagnosis. Even if there's no neurological issue, learning the uber-ASD parent tricks here isnt a waste: they work on most kids regardless.

I would too - I'm totally no expert though. Your post just reminded me that DD also liked glasses when she was very young, although I had no idea she had any difficulties then.
I don't have glasses myself, but all her GPs do and she always tried to grab them, especially my mums, because she uses those cord things (there's probably a special name for them) to hang them round her neck. DD still reacts positively when I wear my sunnies - her eye contact is variable at best, but she does seem to love the glasses!
I think Prince's idea about using them as a prompt to motivate other interaction is great.

Just another thought - DD loved the Mr & Mrs Potato Head Toys when she was young. I din't buy it deliberately for her, in fact it was a present for her older brother. DD loved it - it was called a "Silly Suitcase" and contained various glasses, googly eyes etc - DD was not much into toys then - but she did react to this one.

Thank you for this thread. A 'light' has just come on in my head!!

When dd was under a year she was infactuated with anyone who wore glasses, mostly my brother. I'm no expert but I think if you wear them and start to reduce, that may be a good way of getting your dc to interact.

It's funny. This morning my husband put my glasses on him and dd went to grab them as usual, but looked back towards me several times, with a very quizzical expression! She knows they belong on me! She is a bright girl, whatever else is going on.

If I'm wearing my contacts, she would look at my mouth if she looked at my face at all. I can't remember when she stopped looking into my eyes but she definitely did it during her first months. I miss it so much.