DS2 started biting - having not bitten for ages - he is nearly three - his brother is ASD.

[RollingThunder]

DS1 is ASD - waiting for the formal diagnosis.

DS2 I have obviously worried about a lot, but as he has got better at socialization I have put it out of my mind. He is now nearly three and has a speech delay (just in terms of clearness of speech) and has just started biting again, having not bitten for months and months.

I do realize that if DS1 did not have ASD - i would not now be panicking about DS2, but DS1 does, and I AM!

I would appreciate any thoughts for or against, just hate the thought of having to deal with this for DS2 as well.

NB, DS2 is fairly physical, friendly, sociable, talks to people - all those things - but then at nearly three while we had started worrying about DS1, it was in no way as clear as it is now.

I should add that DS1 is high functioning so has always talked (to everyone), and has increadibly clear and early speech - so in a strange way - the fact that DS2s is slightly delayed is quite reasurring. On the other hand, then I just think maybe he is just somewhere else on the spectrum and my brain goes into meltdown again!

(((Hugs))) Rolling.

I don't think we can really say TBH. My DS1 had delayed speech and is NT (if rather geeky) but he really wanted to communicate despite his poor vocabulary. He didn't use echolalia and was great at trying to share his attention with me.

When DS2 had delayed speech, I thought, no problem, he's just like DS1. But he wasn't, he had poor eye contact, poor play skills, poor social skills and was DXed with ASD at 3.5.

DS3, well, as you can imagine I watched him like a hawk. He talked roughly on time for a boy, even if his first 20 words included 1 - 10! He spent a lot of his time around other DC with SN at DS2's SS and the staff there were never worried about him. He is really quirky, however, but wouldn't get a DX. I'm convinced he's at the top end of the spectrum, though.

All you can do is observe, keep a diary of any 'odd' behaviours and insist on a referral if your 'spidy' sense goes off. Unfortunately, male siblings of those DC with ASD have about a 25% chance of having ASD themselves, but that's still a 75% chance of not having it.

His biting might be born of frustration? If his speech is behind the rest of his development, that could be incredibly frustrating for him. Could you use some signing or visual aids? Might be worth a shot. I do feel that having one DC with SEN can give you a few tools and parenting tricks that those with NT DC only may not have.

Ellenjaneisstillnitmyname

Thank you very much for your reply. I think you are very right that no one can say at this stage. I also think that if it wasn't for ds1, I wouldn't be worried about ds2 at this point.

Also, while there are a few things I could point at, at the moment his socialisation is really good. So I am going to try and stick with that, and try really hard not to worry about regression!