need some advice

[nathollyandmatthew]

my son is 21 months and im finding it very very hard to cope with him, he has alot of health issues and is always in and out of hopsital so im not sure if hes behaviour is that of a "normal" 21 month who has just had a crap start to life or something more

he is terrified of over 15 noises if he sees something assoicated to a noise he freaks out big time, can take 30-45 mins to calm him down, he shakes and nearly makes himself sick from crying to much

hes behaviour is terrible, he doesnt listen at all, he knows what hes doing wrong but he dont care, hes attention span is like 0 he will keep touching something despite being told off 100 times, i cant let him walk very often as he throws himself on the floor and screams like mad and just wont budge, i have tried ignoring him, i hva etried walking off and saying bye but he gets up and then just walks off in oppsite direction.

if he gets annoyed he will smack himself in the face and pull his hair, he bites, smacks.

the only thing that calms him down slightly is music, yesterday we went to harvester and we had to wait for a table, well that was a nightmare, he wouldnt sit still, he says hello to everyone will walk up to a total stranger and say hello but go all shy when he sees some one he knows
he calmed down for like 3 minutes when he heard a song he reconginsied

my daughter was never like this and im finding it so hard to cope even my hubby is as well and hes not here much due to working

do u think we should be worried i was going to mention it to the neurolgist when we see her but then dont wnat to make somehting out of nothing if its normal behaviour

thanks
natalie

It could just be being a 21 month old!!!! plus being in and out of hospital could contribute to his behaviour

But....If you are going to see the neurolgist anyway, you should mention it whilst you are there, no harm

Hi Natalie,

First off (((((((((to you and your family)))))))))))).

I would certainly mention your son's behaviour to the neurologist - and to any other professional that is willing to listen to you and take you seriously. Make them take you seriously!!!. He needs further evaluation also from a developmental paediatrician (if he's not already seeing such a person).

Has anyone mentioned at all the possibility that he may be somewhere on the sutistic spectrum?.

I apologise for my bad typing!!.

thanks
hes under a local paed here who is crap we r seeing him next week but im fed up of him telling me there is nothing wrong with my son depsite having several dx's from GOSH. our GP is very good so could mention it to him, cpz hes 21 months if there was a problem and it him not being a normal 21 month old i would feel no one would do anything til hes older and still doing it.

my sister knows a boy who had ADHD and she thinks matthew is displaying signs of how the little boy behaves, matthew dont knpow this boy so isnt copying.

matthew is horrible to his sister who is 4 and just wants what she has and if she dont give it to him he screms and hits her

hes also very clumsy manged to walk into a side of a tabel yesterday and sent him flying back now has a nice brusie on his cheek

thnaks for ur replys

If your GP is as good as you say get him on side to do some work for you with getting a referral to another paediatrician.

You will need to be persistant in order to get answers. Don't let your worries go unheard.

His behaviours are equally true of my DS1 who is AS and my cousin (God rest his soul) who spent years oh his life beinga dmitted to hospital. I would think it wpuld be impossible for anyone but a good Ed Psych with relevant exoerience to dx in this case..... so get yourself a referral.

Hi there
Just read your thread & sounds like my son, I asked a similar question on here last week & answers encouraged me to follow it up. Rang my sons paed today, waitng for her to ring me back to discuss best & quickest way to go about getting him assessed. DS2 is 3y old really anxious about everything particularly new places, finds the fridges in Tesco scary as they are too noisy. Not too many tantrums but when something isn't just so he completely withdraws, faces the wall & will stay like that for ages, having said that I had 45 mins of screaming tonight because I bought him a new toothbrush & messed up his bedtime routine.
My DS has had problems since v prem birth, sometimes wonder if I have been looking for problems that are not there as I have had suspitions for a while but as he gets older the anxieties are obviously making him unhappy, so need to get it sorted. He is OK with strangers too. My ds1 asked the other day why his brother is so weird. Good luck I hope you get the support from your GP.