DLA form, feel depressed

[pinkbunny2012]

Hi everyone
Just writing a quick message as am in the middle of filling in the dla form for my daughter of 3 who has a severe speech and language delay and is more than likely autistic. the form is such a nightmare i just feel like giving up, its been hanging over me for weeks and now i have to get it done as the date it has to be recieved by is looming. I dont even know if she will get dla. I feel like im betraying her by writing all this negative stuff that is all true, it makes u dwell on the bad things, its just been one thing after another recently and i have a big appointment for her in a couple of days which i have to attend by myself as my family are busy (with imporant things but again its just one thing after another) and my husbands boss wont let him have the time off work. its all becoming just abit to much and its like my daighter is picking up on it and her behaviour has been awful the last couple of days meaning i darent take her out for being stranded or because its envitable people with stare as all she does is scream and cry. i dont even know what the puropse for writing this message on the board here is tbh, just i guess to have someone to talk to about it all, feel free not to reply as there isnt really much to say but just needed to get this off my chest, just hope this dla form will be worth it and i can afford to do abit more with my daughter and get her a new buggy that will hold her weight so i can take her out abit more as am virtually housebound at the moment
thank you for listning xxx

Oh poor you! I also have a 3 year old and I know that filling out the DLA form is horrid. Normally we try not to dwell on the bad stuff but just try to get on with things so having to sit down and write it all out was awful and we ended up taking weeks to complete it! That said, we did get DLA and are using the money to help fund ABA for our DS. As for the stares, you will become immune to them in time. I think if you end up with an official diagnosis it may make things easier to accept. I felt that it gave me a legitimate reason for my DS behaviour and that I could tell people he was autustic. I hope things get a little easier for you and good luck with everything.

The forms are a pain and depressing to fill out - speaking as one who is procrastinating doing the renewal herself. If you google the cerebra guide to dla you will find a lot of step by step advice on how to phrase your answers and what to consider when you are answering the questions. Often we get so used to adapting and developing strategies to get our dcs through the day that you stop registering the extra things you have to do that most families don't.

Also there are often local groups that will help with filling out the forms. Family voice or the NAS might be worth approaching.

DLA forms are horrid but you have to be tough and be as negative as possible in order to get the help for your dd, and she won't know what you wrote. You could do a section a day just to get it out of the way. Remember to photocopy it so you have a complete form you can just copy out next time and it won't be so hard then.

With big appointments get a list of any questions you have going in advance, go over it the night before and have your dd's bag packed with favourite toy/ snack/ etc all ready before you go to bed so there is less stress getting there and you feel a bit more like part of the team not just a passenger.

Ask your dr for referral to the wheelchair service also and they might be able to give you a mclaren or something to solve your buggy issues, you might need to be a bit pushy but you really need wheels to keep her safe when out and about on your own, it will get easier the more you do it. Sometimes just coming here and venting helps a lot! Good luck