Could my DS have aspergers?

[AngryFeet]

DS is 5.10 and in year 1 and has been having a lot of trouble making friends. In fact he has none and even though he has been at school for 4 terms and nursery for 2 years before that has never made a friend. School have done a lot to help him socialise but nothing has worked. He is happy as he is and doesn't seem bothered that he cant get on with his peers. They seem to find him odd/rude and wont play with him or invite him to their parties.

I didn't think aspergers at first but recently the teacher and I have been talking and have both said there is something about him that we can't put our finger on. A list of things that seem to fit are:-

Hand flapping when excited
He shakes his head madly from side to side a lot
No social skills at all even though he plays very well with his older sister at home and we socialise a lot
Approaching children oddly - blowing in their faces, poking them with sticks
He doesnt seem to have empathy - laughs when people get hurt etc (is he too young to understand?)
Speech problems and just sounds like a younger child
Motor issues (seeing OT)
Avoids eye contact a lot and appears not to hear people even though hearing is fine
His Dad definitely has a lot of signs of aspergers
Generally he just seems different to the other kids. Cant really explain why. It is like he is still 3 mentally.

He is perfectly happy on his own and seems to find other children annoying but he has good relationships with the teacher and TAs.

The teacher said they will get the SENCO to assess him again (she watched him for an hour in reception but didn't give much feedback).

I dont know what to think really. I am not too worried at the moment as he seems happy and eager to learn but I know my DH struggled later in primary school without friends and I want to make things easier for DS if I can.

Any ideas?

Hmm, quite a few "red flags" in what you say but obviously cant diagnose on here.

I would recommend keeping a diary of his issues/difficulties, what causes them and how you deal with them.

Make an appointment with your GP and ask for a referral to a developmental paediatrician. Tell the GP what you put in your post.

Keep talking to school because they can really help you if he needs a diagnosis.

Good luck

Ah ok I was just leaving it all to the school but I will go and see the GP if it helps things move a bit faster. Thanks :)

Bump

The wheels of assessment can turn very slowly angry and if left to schools they tend to turn even slower.

Good luck

Try calling autism uk, they will be able to give you some more expert advice than the school (and in my experience the gp). You could also read Tony Attwood book "the complete guide to Asperger syndrome". I don't think either of these things will do any harm whether your child has a need for an assessement or not.

I am reading the Tony Attwood book thanks :) Lots of things make sense for him but he doesn't talk in a monotone, doesn't seem to have obsessions (although DH does) and is affectionate. Everything else seems to add up though. Very confused!

I will call autism uk - how can they help?

My understanding of aspergers is that it affects people in different ways : some people show some of the symptoms only, in some people the signs are very subtle (but it might still affect them greatly).I think Autism uk can provide a listening ear who understands what you are going through (invaluable when you are looking into autism).

Again, not wanting to DX by internet, but you have enough concerns there to persue an assesment. My DS2 jumps and flaps when excited, has no need for friends, is pretty dyspraxic and had very delayed speech. He has an ASD DX. He also has sensory issues, being under sensitive and seeks sensory stimulus, is obsessive, and has no empathy, but does have a great SOH!

School don't generally instigate any sort of medical DX, that needs to be via the medical bods. All you need from your GP is a referral to a developmental paed, because, as Molly says, GPs don't have the necessary experience. Have a look at ASD / AS 'symptoms' and have a list of your concerns with real life examples to convince your GP not to 'wait and see.'

On this board we would almost universally recommend trying to get a DX if appropriate, because although support is supposed to be based on need, rather than DX, it's actually easier to get support with a DX. It also helps you to target your interventions. Tony Attwood books are great.

Be aware that the Aspergers DX is dying out and DC are now being DXed as having an Autism Spectrum Disorder. This covers Aspergers and high functioning autism etc. In fact, the criteria for Aspergers included no speech delay, otherwise you would get an ASD DX, anyway.

What sort of support is he getting at school, if any? Is he on school action or school action plus as he's under an OT? Does he see a SALT? Is the SENCo going to refer him to an educational psychologist (EP)? That would be really useful as they could recommend support in school and would definitely move him to school action plus, but it would be a good idea to consider whether a statement of SEN is in order. DC with AS often cope fairly well lower down in primary school but struggle more in juniors and senior school unless they have appropriate support, which is best sourced via a statement.

Crossed with you. My DS is very affectionate, and doesn't talk in a monotone. Is you DS's speech at all unusual for a DC his age? Is he rather formal or does he repeat things from the TV or books?

My DS loves cuddles, but I think that's partly due to his sensory seeking behaviour.

My DS didn't appear to have obsessions when he was younger, but he would do certain things like run around the car 3 times, laughing, before getting in for a few onths. As he got older, I'm finding he plays on certain games more intently and for longer than other DC, eg 3 months solid of the same computer game. His obsessions seem to roll on to new things quite quickly, though.

To get a DX you have to meet the triad of impairments. Social communication and language, social and emotional skills and flexibility of thought. www.autism.org.uk/working-with/education/educational-professionals-in-schools/breaking-down-barriers-to-learning/asperger-syndrome-the-triad-of-impairments.aspx

Your DS has flags in the first 2 and flexibility of thought includes things like empathy, putting himself in others shoes, understanding what others are thinking. Coping with changes to routine, being able to generalise etc.

www.autism.org.uk/working-with/education/educational-professionals-in-schools/breaking-down-barriers-to-learning/asperger-syndrome-the-triad-of-impairments.aspx

Sorry, forgot to tick the box.

Also since DX can only be done by the health service, the school can only note all their concerns and send you off to the GP anyway.
I would take your list of concerns - with examples if you can, and ask the GP to refer you for a DX. It seems to differ in different parts of the country. Here we were referred to CAMHS where we saw a Paediactric Psycholigist and a SALT for testing.