Referral now suggested by the school - please give me your take on this (and advice)

[DowagersHump]

So after I went to the GP and got a referral off my own bat, the school called me in today and said that they wanted to refer him (well they didn't say that from the off but I could tell they were building up to it).

He doesn't take instruction, won't join in, has massive sensory issues (he has been given a bobbly cushion to sit on, a weighted 'cat' on his lap and a wizard toy to fiddle with) but still does 'inappropriate touching' and is pissing off the other kids (and probably the teacher). He doesn't feel it when he has an injury (unless there's blood and he can see it) etc etc

Teacher said she thinks he need 1-2-1 all day at school. I reckon the likelihood of him getting that level of support are slim to none. The SENCO is talking about a specialist teaching service, OT, paed assessment (which is what I've got arranged) plus another referral to speech and language. #

Any 'I've been there and this is what happened with us' knowledge would be great as well as any advice on the level of time commitment I need to make over the next year. I know that sounds awful but I'm self-employed. If I'm going to have to take him to weekly appointments then that is obviously my priority but it would be really useful to know so I can juggle my workload around him.

I do feel a lot calmer and accepting though :)

Well I think the time committment is quite big tbh, but some of that you can outsource if you have the funds or available volunteers.

Be business-like in your evaluation of provision. Don't go to appointments just because you have them. Ask yourself and the person delivering them, what baseline they are starting from and what targets they are hoping to achieve and when by, and then finally, how they are planning to achieve them and what you can do at home to support.

If from the above questions you get woolly answers or are hard to pin down then don't waste your time and more importantly your child's time that could be put to better us, busting a gut to get to the appointment.

Above all, get the teacher to put in writing that she thinks he needs 1:1.

The law states that children must get what the NEED. It's often proving that the NEED things that is hard, but a teacher stating it will help no end.

I second what Starlight says. It's hard to do, but I found I work better when I detach the 'problem' from DS.
It can be intimidating when you are looking at the mountain of appts, assessments, home programmes, books recommended, suggestions about diet, behaviour management etc.
I prioritise. This month SaLT might be top of the list, next month his school programme, then behaviour etc etc

I think the beginning of the process is the worst, because you have to get over the learning curve of who does what and fighting to get things on place. But it does settle after that. Hope that helps.

I think more than anything that knowledge of how your particular LA 'works' is enormously helpful and something I wish I'd known when I was at your stage. It will save you time and angst if you can work out some sort of picture of who does what, who talks to who, who is effective, etc. Are there any local groups or forums where you can share information? I have been supporting another mother through a similar process and just knowing the names of the right depts to drop into conversations has really helped her (she says!)

Thanks all, very helpful. The inclusion leader mentioned at least 3 different acronyms at our meeting so finding out what they are is the first step. She is going to put his name forward at a monthly meeting she has next Wednesday. I have to sign some forms and say what I was to achieve out of the process

Don't be blinded by referrals, and puting name forward, and someone opening a file, and someone monitoring.

These are not interventions (although arguably they may need to happen) so don't interpret these things as provision.

Provision is when something is actually happening WITH your ds that is making a difference and progress can be shown.

What you want to know is not what THEY are doing, but what your DS is doing that will help him to catch up/access learning iyswim.

Ask school to refer to Educational Psychologist if the Unit thing does not involve the same thing.

The more reports you can get, the more evidence for a statement.
Incidentally, who's idea was the weighted cat? Genius?

I too am very business like with DS2's appointments. This allows me to balance my business diary with his appointments etc but also I ahve developed a business like approach whilst in meetings.
which allows them to be more productive, i give myself the "chair" role & ensure they stay on subject & dont dissolve in to profs whinging about funding, workload etc.
Its not to say i dont dissolve into a mess once back in the car.
Try to get a clear idea in your own head about what you want to achive for your ds.
Dont be talked in to short term, lesser options, hold out for what you know your ds may need, sometimes its worth the wait to get the correct provision.
Whilst your ds is going through assessment it may be a good idea to familiarise yourself with the SEN code of practice.