Please or to access all these features

SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

Absolutely furious!!!!!!!!! School!! AIBU???

3 replies

TICKLETUMBLE · 26/11/2012 10:43

GRRRRRRRRR
Found out DS was not attending the Friday assembly where the whole school attend and share their successes.

He is a wriggler and gets bored and in Foundation he would sit on a TA's lap for the duration and if he really could not cope would be taken out to do something else. I know, beacsue parents are asked to attend the sharing assemblies and I was asked to look after him if he got removed as they didn't have the staff to cover it (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

The new term stated, and the new teacher decided to see how DS would cope in the sharing assesmbly (30-40 minutes). DS attended all but one of the assemblies - when his teacher was off he did not go to it.

He coped fine. It was commented onin his IEP discussion, and was so well behaved that the HT (who is also the SENCO and should bloody well know what progress he is making) who takes the assembly had not even noticed he was there.

Fast forward to after half term, the excellent teacher that has only been there for 6 weeks leaves with no notice (assumed she had fallen out with HT and asked to leave as she was Sooooooooo different and so much better) and the HT is back teaching DS class again, and he's being excluded from class activities again....not because he has been disruptive, but because he MIGHT be disruptive , and because its easier for them to set up an activity at the get go and keep DS out rather than have to .

The TA that is supposed to be there to support DS negated responsibility saying she just does what the teacher tells her to do.

HT stated the following

a) HT is taking assembly AND covering the class teacher role and so IF he(or the other 2 or 3 kids with special needs) was disruptive its a lot of hassle to deal with him and remove him and its not something that she can do, so she decided not to include them at all.

b) HT had not bothered to find out what was happening before half term to carry on the good work that had been done and went back to how things were managed in Foundation year, regardless of how damaging that might be.

HT then complained they were paying for a TA to support him for 10 hours and were not getting funding for her, but apparently she cant be used to support DS during assembly. The TA is not being used to support DS exclusively at any time and HT is putting the children who dont cope with assembly in her care to play games and keep them out of the way, for convenience.

I dont think it is acceptable. AIBU???

DS does not know why things have changed, he thinks it might be because he is not liked by HT and she doesnt want him there , or he is naughty but doesn't really understand why.

Inconsistancy is a major problem for DS.

He clearly also thinks that if he makes enough fuss about other things he doesn't much want to do (coming in form playtime, tidingup at the end of the , stopping PE and changing back into uniform) they will stop insisting he does them and be allowed to just play instead......evidenced by recent behaviour changes.

So basically the HT is making changes that are damaging to DS development of self esteem and understanding of what is expected, where he fits in, because they lost a member of staff and its easier to manage if you exclude him rather than include and support.

Time to change schools? I think it may well be.

OP posts:
bochead · 26/11/2012 11:02

Document the successful pre-half term strategies used and the outcomes on one page

Then document the changes made since half term and the outcomes on a second page.

Try and do it in one page table format so everyone can see at a glance what's gone wrong.

Book formal meeting with HT to discuss. If it is not agreed to immediately implement changes then apply for statement straight away using good practice one pager as an example of the sort of support your child needs should look like. You can also use it to show other schools to guage their reactions to the help you've now established your child needs.

A good inclusive school will love you for having a clear idea of what "good" looks like in relation to appropriate behavior management as it makes their job SO much easier if they have something to go on when a child with SN starts in their care. My son's current school had a helluva job when he started, but once signposted towards the right type of strategy for him they have done a great job since. (His previous school had been barking up the totally wrong tree and he was undiagnosed)

Learning70 · 26/11/2012 12:29

Blimey, are you me?! I am having major probs with my little man, we are in process of getting statement for him. Very similar issues although my little man is very loud when distressed but having been invited into school to discuss his issues and put under thinly veiled pressure to say I think he should be moved. We have been left reeling, yet again, but have no answers at the mo about what do do. What I do know is if we have to put him under major upheaval to move because school want to get rid then they can fess up and say so, not corner me in a room and load pressure and emotional blackmail on me. Sorry no answers for you I'm afraid but you are not the only person sat here this Monday feeling beyond disappointed. I have clarified my situation with one of the independent charities but that doesn't change the way I now feel and all I can do is think about my little boy all day long and how the heck I'm going to this right for him.

Learning70 · 26/11/2012 12:33

Ps forgot to say, despite the utter utter disappointment I feel, I am co operating and working with the school to try and get the right measures in place for him and deal with the here and now, as today is important whatever happens in the future. Hard though it is.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page