DH took Ds to a football lesson.......

[StarlightMcKenzie]

Ds was told to stay in goal. He spent the match facing away from the pitch, looking at the netting and knots. The instructor was getting a bit exasperated but took the time to explain to Ds he had to watch the ball.

He did. He watched it roll straight past him into the net.

DH wants to take Ds again next week. Wwyd?

Excellent. Thank you zzzzz. Tbh I never would have attempted it in the first place. Dh thinks football skills are important for potential social development. Whilst I might agree they can be important I can't see DS ever mastering them, but I guess it is important that Dh does what he can and wants and to try not to underestimate either of them.

DS3 plays at school. I mean 'plays' probably hugely overstates it! But ABA taught him in 1:1 - just passing ball back and forth in a triangle and now he can join in to an extent. DS2 hates football, he would volunteer to go in goal until about age 7 when the others would shove him out whenever he had to try and save a penalty. I agree with your DH though it is socially very useful and its actually probably easier to teach football than the social skills you need to hang out with the boys who are not into football. DS2 games / friendships are much more complicated than if he just played football! But a full on game may be a bit ambitious .

I do try to get ds involved in ball games etc as it can potentially be a good activity to get involved from a social point of view. At present, mostly he just picks up the ball and runs off with it maybe I should try rugby instead

One of the ABA consultant we saw mentioned the story of a boy at a workshop for parents. the boy had zero interest in football but he was very social and wanted to be involved. The video charted how they trained him to play football ABA style. Break it down into each step, rewards reinforcers for kicking the ball to start with etc don't think i need to tell you how and towards the end social stories about how to do celebrations and joining in with others etc. from the video I saw he seemed to be really enjoying being part of it. Never did get to see how good he was but he certainly looked happy playing.

X-posted with you and agnes

While ever DH is willing I would let him keep trying.
At least he stayed in goal :) DS would have just picked up the ball and run off :(

Goalies are usually a bit 'broader phenotype' IMHO. Accepted, included, important, results focussed, and not caught up in complicated power games. He just needs to learn how to save the ball reliably which is much easier than 'football' itself.

Other niches i see for ds later in life might include the drummer in a rock band, the IT person in a consultancy project team, the only one who can understand the holiday rota in a local govt department...

Hi star not sure how old your ds is bit my dd has been going to football since she was 4.5 (she's 8.4 now). When she first started she couldn't kick, wouldn't listen, wouldn't stand still, wouldn't stop annoying other kids, ran off with ball!!! Nightmare!!! She now plays for an all boys team and is valued member of team. Persevere!!! You may find that your local football club ie Portsmouth Town , Plymouth argylle etc have a football in community and run weekend and holiday sessions for kids these are very well done in our area and my dd loves them. This sort of thing may be less stressful than taking him to a proper football youth team where they perhaps are just trying to focus on the kids who are playing in next match. Def worth keeping going though x

Also I got dd some books from library on skills which she enjoyed