completely clueless about ADHD...advice?

[wannabedomesticgoddess]

Not really sure where to start.

DD is 3.9 so my first question is, is that too young to tell if its just "kid behaviour" or something more?

I went through a list of ADHD symptoms yesterday and she had 18 out of 25ish on the list. I had reservations because I still dont know how she is at school as its only three weeks into term. But when DP left her off today he asked the teacher how she was and the teacher replied "a handful."

DP doesnt have PR so I know that to get any more than this I will have to speak to her myself, which I will do tomorrow. But that does indicate the behaviours arent just at home.

Her dad says she isnt as bad with him but I have worked out that he just doesnt want to be thought of as a bad parent, and from a few separate occasions I can see that she may be the same there too.

What do I do? Is three weeks into preschool too early for the school to be able to say anything concrete as they have a lot of kids to be dealing with? Do I speak to the GP?

Any advice would be great. TIA

I first noticed when dd1 was around age 3. She was a perfect baby and a nightamre toddler!!! She wasn't diagnosed til age 6. Perhaps ask preschool how she is there and mention her behaviours at home and see what they say. Good luck its a hard slog

Thanks. :)

DD was a perfect baby too. Got to about 2.5 and it all went downhill.

I think Im not so much worried about getting a dx, though I will do whatever it takes if my worries turn out to be founded, but more, I want to learn how to cope with her.

And obviously I want to rule out things to get to the route of the issue.

At 2.5 my dd flooded her nursery by blocking the sinks with toilet roll and turning taps on! I knew we had some issues then ;)
The positives with her are that she excels at martial arts and has won British championships and she's a great footballer. Use your child's energy for something constructive when they're young. We put dd into both sports age 4 and her concerntration at them both is amazing now - shame she wasn't so focussed at school but at least she has something to make herself feel good about herself.

Also buy the 123 Magic behaviour book from amazon. Doctors will recommend this approach so best you use it first so you can say you are doing it ;)

My dd is being assessed for ADHD after meeting with paed again today. She said that they dont tend to assess for this until the child is at least 6 aas under that they are too young but this of course could just be her opinion. If you feel that this something you should follow up push for it!!! I have been battling it since she went to nursery and only really getting anywhere now so the sooner you push the further you will get. Hope this helps.

Thanks everyone.

We tried DD in tiger cubs but she just wouldnt focus at all. Kept running around after the leader and vying for his attention. She does the same at school.

Theres very little available in our area for her age. Money is also a problem at the minute but if I thought it would help her I would make sure we could afford it.

The annoying bit is, it seems to be only DP and I who see it. Her Dad refuses to admit theres an issue and the extended family all think shes great. But in small doses when shes centre of attention she is perfect.

Does anyone have any specific examples of behaviour that first caused them to worry?

My dd is still the same at 8 true to by for attention has to sit at the front and be right under the nose of her instructor she was horrendous age 4 and 5 but with time and perserverance she has improved. However wherever there's a line she still has to be at the front of it but I think she's got better by going to clubs. She talks incessantly and talks over people I can say something to her and she just won't have heard me as she's too busy concerntrating on what she wants to say!

Yes. Thats DD completely. Shes not too bad with taking turns and sharing but the talking. Oh the talking. I could take her on a hike up a mountain and she would still be talking.

If she cant think of a thing to say she will just repeat something or sing a song or make random noise.

Should I go to my GP? How exactly do I get the ball rolling?

I went to my gp who referred her to a paeditition, who referred her to a occupational therapist too. She was also under a speech therapist and is seen by several people in school.

HTH

U sometimes have to be pushy though as the first gp I saw just thought I was an overanxious first time Mum.

I think Im expecting that to happen foxy. Or them to tell me I just cant parent. And I have thought that myself. But she was so so good before 2.5 I dont think it was an accident.

I also dont know what to highlight. The talking definately, and the attention seeking. Do I make a list of all the behaviours or will they just think I am fitting her into a symptom list?

Sorry if I sound clueless. I just know this is going to be an uphill struggle and I want to get it right so that we can learn how to deal with it and help her.

Shes very bright and I dont want her falling behind at school because she cant focus.

Dont be daft if i am honest i am still clueless now even after starting the process.

ANd at the end on the day she is your child and you know her best.

i would make a list of everything you are concerned about, so that you dont forget anything yo want to discuss. THe main thing is just to be firm and not let them try to brush you off.

ANd remember you are her Mum and know her best and you only want the best for her so dont let anyone tell you otherwise.x

Thanks!

Have any of you had any difference in behaviour with diet?

I was reading on another thread that cereal and milk can trigger.

DD had toast today for breakfast instead of cereal and she has been so calm today compared to yesterday (which was hellish). Then earlier she had a yoghurt and seems to be going downhill again.

Im reading far too much into this arent I?

DD is a very fussy eater and doesnt like wet foods, she will eat cereal with milk but that is it, if you gave her pasta in sauce she wont touch it, she wont eat soup etc.