Who do I contact

[sweetteamum]

I am going to call the LEA about my DD and her refusal of school (anxiety, fear etc etc)

Is there a certain department I should contact or just tell them the problem.

I'm completely at a loss.

1st off, try not to worry too much right now

have you spoken to her school at all?

and tell us a little more about your DD - how old/any DX/siblings?

Please do not phone social services - do not call the LEA first - I will do a google search and get back to you.

Parents' helpline 0808 802 5544

this is the helpline for youngminds

YoungMinds Parents' Helpline

The YoungMinds Parents? Helpline offers free confidential online and telephone support, including information and advice, to any adult worried about the emotional problems, behaviour or mental health of a child or young person up to the age of 25.

*Call us free on 0808 802 5544
Monday to Friday 9.30am-4pm.
*Email [email protected]
*Chat online (Monday to Friday 11am-1pm). Click on button (left) to start chatting with a trained adviser.

I would try them first

Best wishes

Firstly, don't call it 'school refusal'. Find a terminology that puts the blame on them, and therefore becomes THEIR problem not hers.

Call them about your dd's school being unable to meet her needs, cope with her fear/anxiety etc. to the extent that she cannot attend.

Say that the school is unable to accomodate her and ask what alternatives they propose iyswim.

Sorry - I'm not sure of the history of your DD or her difficulties.

My DS is at a school who thankfully are incredibly supportive and were trying to get help from the LEA for him. At one particular meeting with the SENCo I mentioned that he was school refusing and described the anxiety the previous evenings and my difficulties in getting him to his classroom. When I mentioned this - even though we'd had numerous conversations about his other difficulties. THe SENCo said "Great - not that I want him to be this anxious or you to have this difficulty - but it means the LEA will now have to take action". Apparently, school refusal is expensive to LEAs and therefore they would be more likely to become involved.

I know this goes against the grain of other advice, but my suggestion would be to ask for a meeting with the SENco and class teacher/head and discuss the school refusal. I would minute this meeting swell.

HTH

Thank you all so much. I've not had chance to do anything yet. This is only a very quick reply, I'm just on phone.

It's definitely school causing the much worse, issues. She's very happy at weekends and changes on a Sunday. She had lots of time off towards the end of year 6 and it's got worse.

I seem to be being blamed for making her worried (if only she could pick up on it, I'd be so happy) as the school told pp and myself they're worried about my anxieties - but my brother suggests I tell them it's her causing my illness. Anyway, that's another story.

School are fully aware and have had me on the phone/in school each day last week. They're sticking to "she's happy in school" which I believe. It's all things thinking and relating to school, work, homework. She's not completed much homework yet and as there's more of it and regular she's a depressed child at home.

It's my job to make sure my oblivious little girl is happy and I can't even do that :(

I'll come back on later. I really can't thank you all enough for your advice so far. Think young minds is the one place I've not tried to call yet and will be doing so, very soon.

Dd is 11. Asd (un dxd), dyslexia, significant language delay - more with understanding but only just a little more than expressive. Oh and I've applied for statutory assessment and I believe the meeting is due to take place on 27 sept, which no doubt they'll refuse.

YoungMinds are excellent. I've used them.

Seconding what Star said - do not call it 'school refusal'. That's playing straight into their hands - I expect they first used that term. They like to blame the parents.

I'm really confused and think that I gave them rubbish info.

I explained everything. She asked me a few questions and then referred me to nas.

I'm annoyed with myself now, as you all suggested and highly recommended it and then I mess up

Link here to a previous thread with some information on relevant legislation and some sources of help for children who are struggling with attendance for reasons including anxiety:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/1462683-Support-information-sharing-thread-for-families-with-dcs-who-cant-or-wont-go-to-school

Don't worry if you feel you haven't explained everything clearly to young minds - you can always ring them again.

Don't be daft! I doubt you messed up. Call them back and ask them what they are referring you to the NAS FOR?

These things are often staffed by volunteers and all volunteers are not equal.

Call them back - when I called I got a consultation with a psychologist who phoned me back.
Have you spoken to your GP? Who has she seen about her ASD?
My ds has had difficulty attending school for years due his anxiety, there's lots of good advice on here.
School will try to blame your parenting. It seems to be the norm. Don't let that worry you too much - it's ignorance on their part.
Can you home school or do a part time timetable?
Have you looked at other schools in the area that might be more helpful?