This is going to be a bit long winded, sorry!
My asd ds aged 7 is in yr2 at ms school. In yr r and yr1 he had the same small group of 5 children that he made friends with, and in lots of ways they were his role models as when he was unsure of things he would copy what they were doing etc. When he went into yr2,he was seperated from them all (the whole group stayed together in another class). At the time we spoke to the head expressing our view that it was the wrong decision and not going to help ds with his lack of confidence etc, and she said that he would have found any class difficult and was not prepared to put him back with the others as the class lists had all been finalised. In his new class there was only a couple of boys that he knew, and only 1 that I had ever heard him speak of and his name is George.
Since early on in his first term in YR2, my ds has been increasingly "bothered" (school words") by another child who also plays with George called Daniel. For whatever reason I do not know, but he has behaviour issues, and seems to find my ds an easy target, as he doesn't respond well to being pushed around etc, (schools words). My ds has come home from school numerous times with an injury,varying from a scratched arm, face, hand, to a nasty incident which involved having his arm injured with a pencil. (my ds called it a stab, but i don't want to be over dramatic) He has had his work screwed up and stamped on in the bin on one occasion too.
I have on numerous occasions spoken to his teacher, which resulted in the above comments, I have spoken to the senco, who suggested trying to set up a "safe place" where he could go if Daniel was bothering him, or if he felt anxious, which to date has never materialised. I have spoken to the Deputy Head who seemed to be very understanding, and assured me that he or another member of staff would try to have a little chat with ds when possible to see if Daniel had been bothering him. (Anxiety is a major issue with ds). To the best of my knowkedge this has only taken place a couple of times in the last 4 weeks. I have tried to warn ds to stay away from Daniel, but he doesn't seem to understand that if he wants to play with George, (his only familiar face in Yr2) it will usually involve playing with Daniel to as they seem to always be together. I spoke to his teacher again last night following yet another scratched face. She said "other than to put them in solitary confinment what else can she do). She also felt it necessary to point out that ds has to get used to having to face people "bothering him as it will happen throughout life". She sees it that my ds "chooses to play with George and Daniel" which feels to me that they are not getting any idea of how little my ds understands, and how his social skills are. All small group support, emotional literacy work my son has, Daniel has it too, therfore he never has much escape from him.
I accept that I am being over protective of ds, but I don't know how to help him with dealing with all of this. He is having a tough enough time trying to cope with his learning difficulties, without having all of this as well.
He needs help at school to understand that he can still play with his old friends from yrr and 1,even though he is not in the same class. The latest thing i have had from the head was a letter saying that class teacher had seen nothing significant to be a concern, and that they feel that it is in my ds best interest for class situation to remain as it is.
Somebody please tell me to stop worrying, as at the moment I CAN'T. It breaks my heart. Should we try to get SN school, leave him in MS, we just want him to be happy {sad}