Please do not start blaming yourself for the stress you are feeling or believe that everything is your fault.
Believe me, the 'system' finds it MUCH easier to deal with parents who do that, then those who demand help to meet needs that ANYONE would find difficult to manage.
We all are human. Just as we may be tired, irritable, impatient and lose our rag with parents, partner or even friends, so we do with children.
Even without the extra demands of disability, children are demanding, irrational, unreasonable and often have little idea that you have thoughts, feelings and needs of your own!
Add disability into the mix, particularly something like AS, and you are dealing with rigid thought patterns, unwillingness and refusal to change or accommodate anyone else's views and patterns of social behaviour that other parents often see their children leave behind as they grow.
We understand this and we can try and teach our children but it does not make it easier. Younger siblings often copy this and the dynamic between younger sibling and older ASD child can be very difficult indeed.
Did you see the interview with Sally Bercow on the Guardian website and there was one on ITV recently posted - she talked about being judged when out and about etc.
But these people are ignorant in the nicest possible meaning of the word. They don't know what you know.
Don't pick over every mistake. Know what you are dealing with is hard and you are doing the only thing that any parent an do - your very best.