Dyslexic son (7) - worth doing extra-curricular activities or focussing more on supporting reading etc?

[JumpingJellyfish]

Firstly apologies as this isn't really SN, but following advice on other boards to post here!
Brief background - DS, aged 7, has been diagnosed by an educational psychologist (following school identifying issues from the start and following proper protocols thankfully!) as having specific learning difficulties/dyslexia. DS was prem (10 weeks early) and has had certain signs of dyslexia since preschool, so diagnosis is a relief if anything. However he is considerably behind his peers in reading ability and writing/sequencing etc. a huge challenge. School are starting with some support but waiting for education board's literacy teaching & support service to get involved (on the waiting list...). We're trying to work out how best to support him at home.

Our dilemma is whether to focus afterschool time on DS's homeworks/specific exercises to try help his literacy (& numeracy skills...) and minimise time spent at structured afterschool activities (e.g. classes such as football, gymnastics etc.) or to find one or two classes per week where the activity may actually support his development (some things I've read suggest learning a musical instrument can help). I work 4 days a week and so does my DH so afterschool time is a bit squeezed on the 3 days we're both out at work, though my MIL does two of those afternoons (and is willing to take DCs to classes bless her). We also have 2 other DC so pretty busy. Usually we find DS is v tired (mentally) after school so usually do homework straight after dinner e.g. 6pm. The rest of the afternoon he usually plays happily enough, messes about in the garden riding bike etc. The one thing we are signed up to is swimming lessons, but hope to continue these on saturdays to not eat into after school afternoons.

Any advice? Thank you.

Hi jumping no experience of dyslexia but my dd1 was prem she's sitting at average now in her schoolwork except for maths and has ADHD. She does taekwondo twice a week and football twice a week both of which she excels at. For my dd activities are worth persuing as it gives her a great cofidence boost , is something shes good at and enjoys. We did consider a tutor but I doubt after a day at school she would oblige!!

For me, I'd find something he can be really good at - be that a sport or drama or music or whatever. It's lovely to be able to say "Well, yes, you do find this difficult, and need to work really hard at it just to get by, but look how good you are at {whatever}, which lots of dc can't do at all / find difficult / could never do"

Thank you both.

DS used to do gymnastics but he finds following instructions (especially to follow a sequence of instructions) very hard, so would often get bored as he just wasn't able to keep up as it became more complicated, even though he has a good physical ability.
DS loves swimming, so we're keeping going with this and moving to private lessons to overcome some of the issues of following instructions etc....
He doesn't seem to overly enjoy team sports, as he doesn't have any competitive spirit really, but we're trying to think of some activities - possibly martial arts type - that he may enjoy more.
He's great at riding bikes, climbing trees, excellent balance etc. Like you both suggested finding something he excels at makes very good sense.

Do you think it's worth trying music lessons of some sort? He loves listening to music and can sign tunes well, but I'm worried he'd struggle with reading music and that could put him off.

My ds is 16 and i agree giving them confidence in other areas is very helpful. He has dyslexic type problems, but is very bright and maintained top set for sciences all the way through secondary school.
He had swimming lessons since a baby and is a better than average swimmer and now a qualified lifeguard. He also had piano lessons from 6 years old. He never learnt to read music properly. he could identify notes but not follow the music on the page,so learnt by memory/ear.
I do think both these really helped him.
Like your ds he is not a team sport player, but as he got older he has got into climbing and kayaking which he really enjoys and again does well in.

I have no idea why it should be, but I've heard on more than one occasion that drumming is very good for children with dyslexia... of course you might not want that practice going on in your house

Bruffin - DS loves outdoors type sports and as DH & I are also keen outdoorsy types I'm hoping once he's older he'll maybe take to similar activities such as climbing, kayaking, surfing. I'm just keen to find something fairly soon that can help boost his self confidence but won't detract from the time we have to invest in homeworks etc.... Tricky! Will definitely keep up the swimming and talk to him about other options... He has mentioned archery...!

Backforgood - DH is a drummer (and most probably dyslexic too...) - well, in his spare time - so we already have a drum kit in the barn! DS loves messing about on it and DH thinks he has pretty good rhythm so perhaps I should look further at this. May need to sound proof the barn tho as it is right next to the house!!

Piano is good as well, because you are doing different things with each hand.

My advice is not to try to merge the aims of meeting his educational needs and boosting his self esteem. Just let him do something that makes him Feel Good About Himself ? this will rub off into other areas and learn other valuable skills along the way.

It is great that you have got support with the logisitcs of clubs etc. My dyslexic daughter is pretty good musically, she started piano but struggled terribly with reading the notes, and it became a struggle so we stopped. My DH and I also both work, it is tough to fit everything in esp with other kids. But it is also good to get into the habit of doing a few exercises 'little and often' so maybe do one thing for ten mins 4 x a week and keep it consistent. My dd has a private tutor (£££) but she is great at coming up with these short exercises to do little and often (card games etc) which is the key to keeping the motivation and succeeding with the dreaded 'overlearning' which needs to happen.

Sounds like the school have been great.

Handy x

Thanks Handy - excellent advice. I think at the moment we'll start the term with simply swimming lessons factored in and not much else then see how things go. School will be auditioning him anyhow for music lessons (violin!- not necessarily my first choice for DS...!) and if he gets selected then he can get a lesson in school time once a week, if he doesn't then I think we'll spend a bit of time thinking together about what musical instrument he might like to try and then organise something. There is lots of time to try all the other sports/activities but I'd rather not try to squeeze too much in until I know how he feels after school. And he is only 7 I have to remind myself!
Thanks all!

My dyslexic sister is a v talented artist - as are many dyslexics - I think often people with dyslexia see differently and thta is actually really useful as na artist. Anyway from a v young age (6/7) she used t go for art sessions with a real artist (not our prissy school art teacher) who picked up early that she had phenomenal ability in this area. Lots of clay, multi media work etc. It gave her a non -school identity that helped with self-esteem. Alos today she both teaches art and is an exhibited artist - still cant spell at all but thats what spellcheck is for!

My DS 2 is dyslexic, couldn't really read until he was 9, however he can read music no problem at all and enjoys learning the cello.

I found that the best approach for us in helping with reading was little and often ( we used Toe by Toe very successfully at home). As it was only 15 mins at a time we could manage to fit it in every day round his and his brother's activities.

We did ban computer games during the week though.

Firsttimer that's very interesting about your sister. DS was very adverse to drawing right up until the last year, though happier painting and loves working with clay/dough. He did a week of pottery classes last summer and completely loved it. That could be a good thing to do more of...

Wiggly - we've just started toe by toe! It has been working quite well but now DS complains every time I say it's time to do it... But trying to keep it in the daily routine in spite of his protests! Interesting too about your DS2's experience of learning to read music. Good to know it doesn't have to be impossible/insurmountable! Anything we can find that DS enjoys and helps boost his self esteem will be the main driver....

Keep going with Toe by Toe, DS2 went from being not good enough for the very bottom reading group to the top group with a reading age of 15 when he was 11. I didn't start it until he was over eight though and it took us 18 months. If only I could find something that worked as well for his writing.

JumpingJellyfish
Dyslexia is a man made problem, about having problems with a man made communication system the visual notation of speech, or decoding and recoding the graphic symbols society chooses to represent the sounds of speech. Dyslexia is social construct, and language dependent.
There are three cognitive subtypes of developmental dyslexia, auditory, visual, and attentional. which means that an auditory processing disorder, a visual processing disorder, an attention disorder or any combination of the three can cause the dyslexic symptom.
Psychologists are not adequately qualified to assess or diagnose the underlying cognitive disabilities that can cause the dyslexic symptom. Each dyslexic really needs to identify the underlying cognitive disability or disabilities that cause their dyslexic symptom so that they can begin to understand the full nature of their life long cognitive deficit, and begin to understand how thye are best able to work around these problems, and which alternative compensating skills and strengths they are best able to use to work around their deficit and develop their own coping strategies.
You may find some of dyslexia related research paper collections useful sources of information to help you discover the real underlying cognitive issues.

Jumping - yes try some looser freer things. My sis (from memory) hated things like drawing inside the lines or colouring in and if judged on that would ahve been seen as terrible at art. But she had a great sense of colour, perspective, form - the thing that stood out for the artist who kind of mentored her for a long time was her making a multidimensional clay sculpture at age 6/7?. Til today she is very much about texture and feel and colour. In terms of following arrows or maps I still sometimes see her trace the map with her finger and it seems much more like she 'feels' the direction rather than sees it. She seems to function in a way thats v different to me in terms of processing sense data. Art helped her to see the way she works isnt 'wrong' - just bloody inconvenient when dealing with text.

Firsttimer that's very interesting - DS only started to colour in fairly recently (and even now it has to be a picture that really captures his attention - like some superhero he's obsessed with!), but he did love the pottery course and enjoys completely unrestrained freehand drawing especially creating very large pictures (we tape together multiple sheets of paper). But he has to be "in the mood". Mostly he still most enjoys imaginative play - he has a very highly developed imagination.

dolfrog I had a quick look through some of the papers in your link- amazing info! will take me a while to get through even a fraction of it! I had read some of what you describe before. We have taken him to a specialist optometry clinic to start pinning down the eyes side of the equation - hoping to follow this up in the next couple of months, but a lot of his probs seem to be attention/focus related. If you have any further suggestions would love to hear more. Thank you! Effective learning strategies for reading & writing are what we need - and things that boost his self confidence.

Hi Jumping Jelly fish,
Please don't make your DS sit down and do school work, as often it is necessary to develop skills like balance (the pathway in the brain is very linked to auditory and visual pathways) and body position sense before being able to write after all, if you need to really concentrate to sit still on a chair what hope of learning to read and write, If you must write I would go with really really big to use whole body movements as these come first, also have you considered sensory integration may be an issue see www.sensoryintegration.org.uk for more info . I have often found with my dd who is mildly dyslexic that if we went to the playground for 1/2 an hour she would be able to concentrate much better, although like you I work and know its really difficult with homework etc. So much so that I changed my hours so that I could pick her up more days. Hope I don't sound too bossy, you can always ignor me if you disagree!