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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

Head melt - need to off load (long thread and prob incoherent )

9 replies

frizzcat · 09/08/2012 21:40

First things first ds 7 ASD, dd 17mths - seems to be NT so far.
Right I'm struggling this summer with things to do with dc. Dd needs to take a nap around midday and so I need to fit something into the morning and then late afternoon. Dd will sleep in her cot or the car but not buggy way too much going on and she wants to be out walking/talking to everyone and anything. If she doesn't have that sleep then she turns into a temper mess. I feel really bad for ds because his life is now dictated by dds routine which was set to fit in with ds school runs. When we are out dd is mobile and so needs watching which means I'm not watching ds. He isn't a runner and will wait around for dd - but then he does his talking to himself or jumping around (he's usually acting something out), this behaviour singles him out as acting strangely and means other children don't try to play with him. Between running after dd and and reminding ds when hes doing his thing - is the called stemming? That brings me onto my next thing ...
I've been on here about a year - and still don't know a quarter of what you lot know, I don't know the jargon and I always feel on the back foot. We have private SALT and I am trying to research ABA but not sure if a full blown ABA is the best way to go it if I could actually do it with dd running around. I'm looking at two noise program's for ds, one he would do over 20wks listening to music with special bone conduction head phones OR one where he goes for 2wks listens to music and watches lights - I know this is AIT but is the former?? At 2k a piece I can only pick one and I'm lose as to which one to choose.
Also a lot of you seem to find groups for your dc to attend - proper SN ones too. The professionals I've dealt with think that ds should attend NT groups because he would learn better to socialise from a group that doesn't have issues socialising. But I think he needs to build confidence and a group that is similar to him would be better for now .....how do you all find these places, I scoured the primary times looking for something for him but there was nothing.
I am panicking that I'm not doing enough that I have so many balls in the air and I can't catch them all. Ds SALT has done wonders and he can speak well but how do I move him on to the next stage so he will have more confidence talking to other dc.
What do you all do? What would you do if you had my ds - no LD, speech delay but closing the gap, wants to socialise but either loses track of the game, is ignored or watches from the sidelines - when he does get a chance to play its a joy. He has sensory issues around noise. He's in MS - good and helpful school - but I feel like I'm in a maze and I can't find the exit ........and all the while there a breeze block on my brain
Kicks up the arse are possibly required - advice needed Confused

OP posts:
coff33pot · 09/08/2012 23:26

bear with me kids now in bed coffee made and I am reading it! Grin

frizzcat · 09/08/2012 23:57

You'll need that coffee - or big boots to give me the kick I probably need

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coff33pot · 10/08/2012 01:34

Ok read it on my phone as my net conked out when making coffee and still not bk grrrr I can't type on this thing so I will kick u tomorrow lol x

babiki · 10/08/2012 07:43

Special school have got sn meetings and clubs for sn children, they don't have to be actually attending the school, our local charity runs Saturday club which is good and nt siblings love it ( ds is almost three so youngest but at least nobody is surprised by his behaviour), also found swimming for sn kids in our local pool every Sunday... Ask around there must be sonething going on. I feel if your ds could learn from copying nt kids he would't be autistic - but just my personal opinion, always found this advice a bit silly tbh. At the moment I gave up on all nt toddler groups, it just makes me feel low as ds is like a giant baby (gdd) and cannot really join in. Also Mencap run some groups in our area.

auntevil · 10/08/2012 11:16

We go to a SN play and stay throughout summer. It was originally run by members from portage, but it covers children up to 10. You could try ringing somewhere like portage to ask what is on in the area for older children.
The local council run (although run by a company) sports centres also have sessions specifically for SN. Ours has swimming, football and soft play (not the baby one, the whole padded climbing/slide/rope bridge type.
As far as whether to do activities that are MS or SN, personally I would try both - dependent on the activity. My DS always did sport MS as there are rules, and it's not so much social interaction as it is doing the activity.
Also you could try things like beavers - they do both MS and SN groups.
As babiki suggested, MENCAP should also have a list of activities - which will be particularly helpful as your DS gets older.
Also, you have what every parent of different age groups have - trying to find a one size fits all activity. It's tough, getting easier as they get older (not helpful at the moment, but just to let you know it does get easier). I try to pace the week, doing some going out activities and some at home activities so that I don't have to worry that one of them is always missing out.
Does he have friends at school? would they come around for a play date? Even if its just a friend that will play on playstation/wii or whatever.
You don't need a kick btw, you just need a little time to get your head around everything. Having a 17 month old dd won't help with giving you that time Grin - I remember how active they are - seriously don't envy you.

coff33pot · 10/08/2012 13:27

As for SN groups there are none in my area so its difficult and I do sympathise with you.

Try the NAS website and see if there is one in your area. I have just found mine do a swimming club during the summer and weekly over the year I think so I have put my name down to join that.

I have filled in a name for a social skills/confidence building club for children on the spectrum but that has a 6 month waiting list as it is. That is called Dreadnought? Perhaps the NAS or council will know what is in your area.

I dont see the issue with your son going to SN groups where he could well feel more comfortable with himself. He is going to MS so he is going to meet all the NT children for social practise anyhow. To be honest DS seems to home in to children like himself anyhow and is more sociable with them and ignores the NT ones which to him are hard work.

So far swimming is on the agenda. Can he ride a bike? Can you? was thinking maybe just taking bikes to the park and perhaps a safety seat for the little un on your bike.

DS plays along side people so soft play is usually the option I use. Swimming was good because he was having fun and talking when he wanted to but no pressure because everyone was doing their own thing anyway.

Perhaps look up arts and crafts clubs where you could all get messy? Our local art gallery does regular once a month family time.

frizzcat · 10/08/2012 21:01

Thanks ladies here's some Wine to kick start your weekend.
I will try Mencap and Nas and see what they have. Dd is just such a wee bundle of energy - everyone and everything is of interest, she's so chatty the whole day is "whatissit" and "mama mama!" that poor ds is pushed out. Naturally he isn't always responsive to her and so she has now worked out things that annoy him just so she gets a reaction! I suppose I should be grateful as it was around this time that I went to the HV about SALT for ds, I just knew something was up.
I'm currently panic packing for our hols tomorrow as trying to get it done with dc around is impossible
Thanks again lovelies always much appreciated

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coff33pot · 10/08/2012 22:46

oooh! have a fab holiday! Grin

frizzcat · 10/08/2012 22:52

Cheers - isle of wight here we come.... All glamour here you know

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