DS is on one and I am worried sick about my DD :(

[coff33pot]

Sorry I have not been on or around much. Been lurking but mind is too crowded up to give any supportive advice right now.

DS is having a temperament relapse I shall call it. Its like he has suddenly gone back to toddler stage tantrum and behaviour wise. I could put it down to DD being ill and rushing to hospital but its not just all that. So much so I have had to lock my doors as he escaped twice yesterday from the garden and plainly walked out the front door yesterday infront of a car.I cant let him out to play with the other children as unfortunately the other kids lead him on and two days ago he was on his way to town and this child bought him energy drinks 4 of them! and found it funny that we were banging on doors and driving around in cars looking for him :( He is angry that I have grounded him so to speak so thats not helping but I am guessing I have had a calm platteau and am now at the next phase? Last night the language he yelled which he had picked up was horrible and totally took me by surprise. I am trying to keep patience knowing it is a sort of "this is how you act to fit in if you want friends" sort of time of it but I am not happy. Then there is this "baby" act whining, crying, baby talk when he is coming down.

Eldest DD scared the life out of herself and me at the weekend by having something that I can only say resembed a mini stroke. Her left side stopped working and the left side of her face felt like she had been to the dentist. Her words were all muddled. Its all come back now apart from cramps and heavyness and overall tiredness with the occasional confusion when decision making. She has now got to have an MRI for her brain and a monitor for her heart for 24 hours.

These are my babies for gods sake what did I do in my past life that means my babies are suffering :( :(

Its not you coff.

I wonder if your dd suffers from hemiplegic migraine? I do and its awful...my first one I got rushed to hospital too...LP, CT scan the works...

I know that my dc arent themselves atm...maybe its the heart? ds1 was very unlike himself yesterday and kept telling me his head hurt in the sun!!...

{{{{hugs}}}}

Lots of hugs and what little calm I have left (and yes, it's only Tuesday)

Hope that whatever's up with your DD turns out to be something benign.

As for doors, we always keep ours locked (and in fraught moments, keys in pockets rather than left out or in door). Windows, too. Have just opened the livingroom window to let some air through and locked it open an inch, or else either a boy or his toys would be out there.

Thanks guys its just a low low day I think. Returned Honks and hugs for everyone who is having a stressy time of it today x

I think I made a huge mistake in allowing him out to play. To me he needed to learn life skills, the good and the bad but on one side he is no way ready and on the other he is HF and cannot understand why he cant be the same as everyone else. Its a battle. But the bullying has as I thought had an opposite effect of if you cant beat them join them I suppose. The business with his slow worm was the last straw I think. You know what I mean I will swear, act big, follow like a sheep because I desperately want to have friends and I desparately need to be in control. I think he has resigned this week that this is what happens if you are weak but its oh so the wrong decision. He has already gone through the "If you play with me I will give you my sweets/crisps/lolly" to keep someone with him which was heartbraking enough to explain those are not true friends. He just doesnt get it :(

DDs health is a contstant worry. She suffers from anxiety, bad dad, bad school, bad teen years, bad self esteem. She is lovely really lovely and doesnt look ill on the outside to everyone but has lived on meds since she was 16. At the moment she has PTSD from a ugly experience last year that some bastard got away with and I cant afford to go to court myself for her. Small place so you can imagine everyday visual sightings I swear I am going to run him over one day. Its also looking more and more like gall bladder removal due to her pancreas so we were told yesterday. She swells up with acrocynosis. She is eating like a horse but has now gone from 10st to a size 6 and currently wearing my 11 yr olds leggings in the space of 4 weeks. Her bloods were fine and sugar levels were 6.1 so that was ok.

She had a lump appear on her arm which ended up with bruised ring around it and it was a hard lump. It disapeared and she assumed she knocked herself. I am terrified it was a clot and that is what passed through on saturday as it was so sudden from a stabbing pain in her leg, then her arm, then she went loo and stumbled down stairs like a zombie it was all so quick. She had gone for a power walk with the dog earlier and was fine up till that point. But had been sufferring back ache and dizzyness for a few weeks now.

I am going to get outside I think and come back when its dark, find a field and let DS run while I shake this morose rubbish out of my head x

Oh coff33e just want to send a hug. Really hope your DD gets home soon and all will be well. It is so difficult knowing what to do for the best all the time, you want them to fit in and have some freedom but the reality is it can be so much more difficult for our kids. Do understand, been a bit tricky here too last few days. Hoping all calms down soon for your and your lovely family.

That all sounds grim. I think you are right re the playing out. My ds is the same age as yours and I daren't let him play alone anywhere. I watch from a distance so that I can step in when he needs help. Other children are cruel and can't be trusted IMO ( ds only plays unsupervised with friends' kids) and my ds can't be trusted not to hurt other kids if they are mean to him.
I know to other people it looks like helicopter parenting but I think of his social age (about 4) not his actual age and you would never let a 4 yr old play out.

coff - so sorry you are having all this to deal with.I hope your children are better soon.Take care of yourself.

Sorry you are having such a stressful time - there should be some law that only one major worry is allowed to come along at once. We've all had that thought about what did I do to make this happen but it's just being in a really hard situation makes you doubt yourself. Following your "story" on here it's obvious your dcs couldn't have a better mum looking out for them. Hope things look up for you soon.

I'm sorry to hear this, Coff33. I hope your DD is OK and they get to the bottom of this. She's had a really tough time. It's not bloody fair at all. But at least she's lucky to have such a supportive mum.

About the playing out, it so depends on your neighbourhood. Nobody plays out in my road at all. But just 1/4 of a mile away my friend's DC and all their neighbours kids play out in the back lane from 3 or 4 yo. It does sound like your DS is too vulnerable at the moment, though, but it's very hard to take back that sort of independence.

Coff33, so sorry things are so tough at the moment. Can't read very well this evening, as none too clever myself, but scan read the thread and noticed you mentioned a lump with a ring around.

Did it look anything like these?

First thing I thought was Lyme's Disease, it can play havoc with the whole body, mimic other illnesses and cause the sort of neurological symptoms you mentioned your dd having. In fact they usually try to rule it out in people who have classic MS symptoms, as it can be so similar in presentation. It's characterised by a bullseye type mark that appears after being bitten by a tick. Very often the patient never even knows they've been bitten.

Might be worth asking the docs about?

Coff, I was reading something about this sort of relayed reaction on an elective home education website. The advice was to just ride it out till the school crap is expelled from their system. I guess it's like any delayed shock reaction, but obviously much with the SN as well.

Hope your dd feels better soon and it turns out to be something minor.

We cannot allow 6yo DS2 out on his own either - certainly not in an unenclosed area! No sense of danger and a runner ... bad combination. He also does not really know how to act around other children at all, so we suspect would likely be bullied or tormented. The few children in our area are at least 3-4 years older than him anyway.

I hope they can find out what is causing our DD's symptoms - when you said that about a ring around it, I wondered about lyme's as well. It can certainly create chaos with your system.

Sorry I have not replied its been another mad week with just a pop on and off the net. I have noted lime disease down for DD to mention to the GP but this lump did not have a bullseye bit in the centre but nevertheless its good to mention and get checked.

She is home now as they said because she can now walk and talk better she doesnt need a bed which is true but still tired and odd waves of confusion and constant leg/arm cramping. Her MRI is next week so we are waiting for that. She is upset that she is all skin and bone and I am doing my best to say otherwise even though it is obvious. Her ideal weight for her height is up to 11st 3lb and she was always at a comfortable weight of 10st 4lb and the lowest she can go berfore its an issue is 8st 3lb she is currently at 8st 12lb and losing at a rate of 4lb per week despite pigging out on food :( maybe the docs will take her seriously in about 3 weeks when she is underweight.....

DS is still on one. I have padlocked the back garden and have to contstantly lock the front door and we have had 3 meltdowns where he has seen no reason. Part of it is worry for DD as that has unsettled him but the other part seems to be a hormonal change as he is even yelling at me which has always been non existent. Finally finished his DLA form today which had taken me 12 months or more of coping with a question at a time. Somehow the mood he has been in has made it easier to finish although gutting.

Hope everyone elses children are more chilled out this week x