How long does toddler stage last for an asd child?

[someoneoutthere]

DS has turned 7 last week. As well as celebrating his birthday and thinking about all the progress he has made since the dx, I could not seem to help thinking about the fact that another birthday has gone and he is still at the toddler stage. DS acts, behaves, talks like a toddler. We read toddler's book to him ( books like 'we are going on a bear hunt') before going to bed as that's the stage he is at atm. We have to carry him to his bed like a toddler as he asks for it (I guess we could say 'no' and he would not cry about it). He still talks in half sentences like a 2-3 years toddler, he loves nursery rhymes and acts out all the actions when watching you tube. He does everything that a toddler would do except having a toddler tantrum. It feels like he is stuck in a extended toddler stage. I am not sure if I am explaining it well, it's just that his speech is so behind, it sounds like a toddler talking with some unclear speech. Do they ever move on from this stage? DS has been like this for about two years now. Apart from the fact that he is now beginning to read and write, and starting to ask where and what questions, everything else stayed the same.

Sorry, if I have not explained things well. It feels like time has stayed still with him. Does it make any sense to anybody?

Yes, DD is 6 in October and is exactly like a giant toddler.

Dd3 is 9 now and she has just recently decided that she doesnt need her Topsy and Tim books anymore and has got rid of some cuddly toys.

She still reverts to toddler language sometimes eg. "me want cuddle"
She also lies all over me and wipes her dirty hands/face on my clothes, just like a toddler.

Emotionally she still handles things like disappointment in exactly the same way as she did when she was 4 but she is more lippy about it.

I may be wrong but I think that this is all part and parcel of ASD.

Fang, do you have to sing lullaby to put your dd to sleep? Ineed, DS still talks in toddler language, but he is very behind with his speech. Is being stuck at the toddler stage part and parcel of asd? I thought someone said they reach the other stages of development, albeit late.

No, although I usually sing to get DD to interact with me, she loves singing.

When it comes to sleep time though I interact with her as little as possible as she plays on it and won't go to sleep!

My 6 year old is very much like a giant toddler. And his language isn't even there, yet.

Even my 8 year old, even though very intelligent and looking and sometimes sounding much older than he is, has the emotional maturity of a toddler.

yes. mine didn't come out of nappies until they were 5 and 6 and eldest - now 13 - still soils. He didn't talk at all for years and not more than the odd word until he was 7 and then he talked at about a 2yr old level for quite some time. His speech has really come on in recent years and now he sounds, apparently, as though english is not his first language (is how it has been described to me by others ) but he is very chatty and just loves to interact with people.

My youngest was exclusively echolalic for many years but now can use language with intent to communicate. He just doesn't choose to! He will speak only as he needs to to get his needs met. He isn't interested in chatting. They can't read stories more complex than toddler stories. - they can read the words, but they don't 'get' it, iyswim. They are both very very young for their age.

tbh, I don't even notice it most of the time. Only when I have the chance to observe them next to an nt child of the same age. Then it hits me.

I don't know 'what'sort of child DD1 is, but she is 6.7 now, and whilst her learning has progressed (she remembered that her class had been taking about orca whales) she is still toddler like.

Still needs complete prompting with dressing, a musical star at bed time, all that stuff. She's been at this stage for about 3 yearsso far, I think.

DS is 7 (8 in October):
still not toilet trained
still has a night light
still likes Thomas the tank, the Gruffalo, hungry caterpillar, etc
still extremely clingy
is sat right now with an old favourite blanket

His talking has come on in leaps and bounds and the last few months he's had some nice moments of being considerate to other children's feelings - a major breakthrough!

I think it just takes them a lot longer a lot more encouragement to get there. Also depends where they are on the spectrum and any levels of learning difficulties they may or may not have.

Dd2 is 6.5 and still like a toddler in a lot of ways, still eats with her fingers, still has a dummy for bed and her speach is very delayed (although she can speak in sentances when she wants too), but in some areas she is growing up, she likes older childrens programmes (no longer watches cbeebes), plays with older childrens toys and wants the latest things/toys out but maybe this is because she has a older sister?

Isn't that the strangest thing about children like ours? They progress in some ways, but then they are completely 'stuck'in other ways.

DD1 still can't cope with cbbc, although oddly she does like ben10.

It is.

I was with a friend of mine yesterday. We were in a coffee/bookshop and choosing books for our children.

She chose a big thick think it was just william book for her son (9)

I chose this for my 11 yr old and a spongebob picture book for my 13 year old.

I wanted to cry. it hit me so hard.

Ah yes to eating with fingers still. Was trying again the other day to get HIM to chop up his sausages, that did not go well!

Mine likes very young things, the only exception being Doctor Who! Very odd mixture .

Hecate I think direct comparisons like that do hit us hard, they do me anyway. Mine chose a charlie and lola board book with a finger puppet attached to it at the weekend.

Yeh, I know what you mean Hecate and boredandrestless, everytime we are in a toyshop DS goes for teletubbies and barney or timmy toys. Strangely enough, DS is good with physical stuffs, so good with eating using spoon and a fork, good at sports. I guess I can say at least he is ahead of his peers on one thing and that is sport. Well, I will describe DS as somebody who speaks English as a foreign language.

DS will only watch cbeebies, but he does not have the concentration to follow a whole episode, so he only watches the songs. At bedtime I have to sing cbeebies bedtime song for him as he likes that one now. We used to sing 'hush little baby'. It all feels so strange as we could not have a bedtime routine for him up until he was five. He used to fall asleep on the sofa or we had to take him for a drive to put him to sleep as he hated bedtime or bed. Now we are doing what we had done for dd when she was a baby and toddler.