Am I fooling myself that ds can stay in mainstream?

[Iceflower]

Ds is 9, has AS, SPD, Dyspraxia, and is in Y4 at a state primary. He is at SA+, has the following support

• sensory integration 4 x 15 mins per week
• own workspace and laptop
• time out cards and emotion dials
• recently introduced 1-1 for writing long passages in English periods
• he leaves 30 mins earlier at the end of the day to avoid the hustle of home time
• being introduced mid-day sensory breaks 5 x 15 mins per week
• to be introduced next year, 1-1 in maths periods

In spite of all these, he's deteriorating fast, full of anxiety, and his GP has referred him to CAHMS for depression. He has missed a few days of school and every day it gets harder to get him to school. Every day school rings to pick him up. I have sent paperwork to an advocate to apply for a statement; he's been assessed by a private SALT who's preparing a programme and school have agreed to provide 2 x 15 mins per week; a private EP will be assessing him in two weeks; an NHS OT has assessed him and is drawing up a programme and will be conducting a workstation assessment; school is requesting an IT assessment to see what technology will be helpful. All these are at my request, by the way .

Am I fooling myself that he can stay in mainstream, or should I be going for a specialist asd provision? I think I know the answer, really, but would appreciate other views.

Has anyone advised you to apply for a Statement of special needs from the LEA?. Use IPSEA's website www.ipsea.org.uk and use their letters provided.

Forget using an advocate; you are his best and only advocate here!. Also outsiders can sit on applications for ages without doing anything. You as parents can make such an application yourselves, you do not need anyone's permission to do this for you. Also you can appeal in the event the LEA say no to statutory assessment.

It can take around 6 months plus to set up a statement doc so time is important.

It seems that his needs on SA plus are clearly not being met by school; the support he is receiving is not enough over the course of a school week.

Thanks Attila, I probably didn't make it clear in my post - I'm making a parental request for an SEN assessment, and an advocate is helping me make it.

I agree his needs are not being met, what I do wonder is if his current placement is right for him. When all the support that is being proposed now is in place, it will be in all but name full time 1-1. A statement would not bring any more. And he is not coping.

I think you should look round the alternatives, and then you'll know a lot more than you know now.

Not all specialist placements are the same. The borderline ms ones are the most difficult to find and get right and 'usually' independent.

I think it would be sensible to call and visit as many as possible. Interestingly for ASD, I found often the state specialist schools (as long as they were ASD only) were actually better than many of the independents, but that was just my perception from the ones I saw, and from trying to see ds in them.

DS has made more progress in a term at a specialist school than a whole year in mainstream. This is not because he cannot learn in mainstream, but that the majority of mainstream schools do not have the consistency of training and quality provision that you get in a specialist school. They easily could have, - but they don't as a general rule.

Please look at ALL your options NOW. The right school can make such a big difference to kids with AS and their families.

If you feel the school he is in isn't right, it probably isn't. As soon as someone tells me they are having trouble getting a child into school then something is wrong and has got to change. and quick!!!

We were really lucky with DS when we looked at DS special school we knew it was the right place for him. still can be an emotional decision though. look at other options as well. some of our local primaries have ASD units attached. They can absolutely bridge the gap between special needs and MS.

Looking at your list, I would say that he spends a lot of his school day working by himself or with 1-1 support; and leaves early etc. He may be in a MS school but he doesn't seem to be very integrated into it iyswim. (This was what my ds was like although his needs were different) On that basis I think I would be looking at other options on the basis that it doesn't hurt to look, and there may be something better out there for him.

If you ask yourself 'can he stay in ms?' you are asking the wrong question.

What you need to ask yourself is 'which would be the best school for my DS?'

Agree with Indigo. Look at full range of available options. Include other mainstreams in your search nd consider how the statement might need to be adapted to enable him to LEARN there (not cope).

Thanks everyone, and Star, you must be a very proficient one-handed typist or Asteroid's a good sleeper .

As I said in my OP, I think I know the answer already but needed to be told! When he was in year 2, I looked round other mainstream primaries, and they were no different. There is no state asd provision at primary level, and the ones at secondary have become "dumping grounds for asd children with behaviour problems" - this is a quote from the LA EO, repeated to me by my advocate when I was going through tribunal for his elder sister (who has a place at an independent AS school).

So it's independent specialist or mainstream with lots of support. Independent would have to be boarding, as ds gets car sick after 10 minutes. This is a big decision, so you can probably see why I'm trying to hang on to mainstream with support.

Sorry, I know I'm rambling, and you have kindly confirmed what I've been thinking .

Hours of being pinned to the sofa by a greedy guts!

Thing is no one official actually are allowed to tell you what's they think is best.it can make it very hard.

When we were making the special school decision I had a wobble, I phoned my early years support team and asked what about mainstream with support? he's doing so well at mainstream nursery. She blurted out accidentally on purpose oh but I thought you were so set on (name of special school) she quickly added of course the ms school is lovely to o and she of course couldn't influence my decision!!
Of course I knew he wasn't right for main stream, but havingr the opinion of an independent profession who I respected and knew ds really helped me know I was doing the right thing.

it sounds like you know.

LunarRose Thank you for sharing your experience .

My son is coming to the end of primary school. He's in mainstream with HF asd. He has a Statement. He's clever but..... Two yrs ago, he started with anxiety. It progressed to OCD. He was diagnosed with OCD by CAMHS in 2010 aged just before his 10th birthday.

The effect of the anxiety/OCD has devastated his education. Last statement review highlighted that he would need a mainstream secondary with asd support u it attachment. That's where he's going. We're in the process of transition and he's liking it.

He would never have survived mainstream secondary so, I know it's right for him.

You'll need to go with what's right for your ds and his needs