Any thoughts please on stimming in an older child?

[Penneyanne]

I would love to hear any views any of you might have on the best way to cope with/tolerate/eliminate stimming in an older child with ASD, My ds is 12 with AS and a big strapping lad of 5ft 6in but he absolutely loves to rock quite vigorously to pop music. When he was dx at 10, the advice we were given from the psych who dx him was that stimming is ok as long as its something the child can regulate enough to do privately in his own room etc and learn not to do in public etc. We have kept to this advice but I am finding it is becoming difficult for him at times to regulate himself enough to completely stop this in public.For example , recently he was at the cinema and started to do it without realising when a soundtrack he liked came on.He also is inclined to rock vigorously in the car while listening to his mp3 player.
I recently heard a mum on the radio tell how her 19yr old ds with AS was out with a couple of other friends in a bar listening to a live music session , and he began rocking back and forth in front of the band and the management had him removed as they thought he was on drugs.
I have discussed the possibility of tryng to completely stop this rocking with him but he insists that he enjoys it too much to ever want to stop,his life will no longer be enjoyable etc. I must say it does act as a brilliant way of calming him down when he is agitated though.
Any thoughts on this anyone-will he become much more aware of doing this as he gets older and be able to control it better?I really dont know where to go with this one! Sorry its much longer than I had planned.

Could you do some sort of social story with him, that allows him to identify when it is appropriate for him, when it isn't? Also because he will hear music in shopping malls, hairdresses, etc could he also identify a behaviour that he could do instead during the times he has identified as being inappropriate to rock - my son carries a ball of blue tack in his pocket that he can fiddle with x

Can you get back in touch with the psych and ask for help? Or a Behavioural Therapist?

There are some things my son (who is only 8 so not really comparable) simply cannot stop doing but the Behavioural Therapist has helped me minimise some things.

My 8yo does a lot of visual stimming- his teacher comments on how distracting it is for the rest of his class. Also, it blocks other sensory info for him (thats why he likes it) so he cant listen to other things around him.

Like above, he finds a ball of blu-tack in his pocket helps (sometimes this isnt enough and he uses a pintack ow).

It seems like theres a few steps here: first he has to learn when this happens, then where it is appropriate for him to rock and where not, then what alternative but appropriate sensory stuff he can do that will be sufficiently satisfying until he gets to a more private place. He probably also needs to have a good rock then too to get over it.

I don't know if Behaviour Therapy would work terribly well; he is getting enormous sensory rewards from doing this. It needs to be re-directed or replaced, not extinguished.

Porridgelover,can I ask out of curiousity what you mean by visual stimming-I am intrigued by this. You are right about the behaviour therapy I think-this is my feeling also. He says himself that he has no intention of giving it up-he loves it too much . I will certainly try the ball of blutac !

More info on stimming.

A sensory trained OT should be able to tell you what sensory reward he's getting from the rocking (is it proprioceptive/vestibular/visual/what?) and see if there's an alternative 'socially acceptable' way for him to get it?
E.g. I know for my DS if he gets some rotatory body movement, he needs to stim less. School have been very reluctant to implement this though.

Thanks Porridgelover-very helpful!