Urgent advice - stressing out big time

[Absolutelydesperately]

Name-changed but you'll probably know who I am. Ds has no dx (likely AS/PDA) but a sm of over 20 hours. Since December school have had him on a reduced timetable as part of a PSP so that he's only there for the statemented hours. We were told he would go back full time gradually but this hasn't happened. They excluded him and then said any further incidents would result in permanent exclusion but suggested he attended a course and we felt we had to agree or risk him being excluded.He has now started on a 5 week course at a PRU to help with self-esteem and small group work. He hates it there, the children are really rough and ds is the lowest we've ever seen him (anxiety levels sky high). We have AR shortly and I have been chasing for all the paperwork and Senco who usually responds very quickly hasn't . I found out that a transition day is planned so everyone goes to their next year classes to meet staff etc. I asked what they had planned for ds as he will miss it and again - silence. Dh spoke to them today and it was all 'we'll discuss it at the review meeting' all very vague. Dh told them that when ds finishes the course we are expecting him back there full time - more vagueness Now,due to ds's anxiety we want to pull him from the course as it has no way helped his self-esteem and made him feel worse. We wish to tell the school that he will be back there full-time. The sm says that if the school feel that any additional hours are required then they need to fund these.So, am now worried what will happen to ds. Don't want to throw him in the deep end but feel they should be providing support. I feel it is all down to finances but I think that if they permanently exclude they are fined quite a lot.
Any advice from anyone as dh and I are just feeling sick about it all. They were all positive in a recent meeting about next year but now we think they will state that they can't have him there. As it's so close to the hol's we're going to be screwed if we need somewhere else.

can you get him signed off by the GP the poor lad don't send him into PRU if it's making things worse
do you really want him to go back to that school - it sounds awful

Pull him out now. Phone an educational welfare officer and the LA and tell them he is not going back and you are requesting an AR meeting forthwith to discuss his upcoming transition......

Write down everything you can remember as a diary and date the days to show where his anxietys were heightened to add to the AR information.

Oh desperately it sounds awful. Your poor DS. God PRU's are really not suitable for our children are they? :(

Sorry had to post and rush out. Thanks all. We have a meeting with a health professional tomorrow so will be taking advice from him too. Apparently when dh pointed out that ds was going back there full time she said 'we'll see about that'. What can they do? Surely if we place him full time they can't just say no to it?

what's the school named on his statement?

See if you can get signed off for anxiety but say that can manage home tutoring (as anxiety relates to attending PRU) then tell LA they have 5 days to arrange a home tutor. That should focus their minds a bit.
If they won't provide a home tutor after 5 days make a written complaint and go to the Ombudsman and explain that while you have only just made the written complaint your DS has been on reduced TT since Dec and in PRU since whenever and PRU placement is also breaking down so you need LA to step in with home tutoring asap until a solution can be found.
There is provision in SENCOP for LA to place in a special school as emergency even without a Statement [8.23] / pending an assessment / reassessment

It sounds from your Op as if you want your ds back in mainstream schooling with good support. You are probably right that school are trying to manouvre him out by threatening with exclusions and hoping you will take him out. If you want him there you are probably going to have to take some advice from IPSEA. Seems to me that they are obliged to take him back full time as you have a right to a mainstream education, the problem will come when they start excluding him. They may then start to gather evidence through temp exclusions in order to permanently exclude. Your main focus should be to get full time 1:1. If annual review is coming up, you need to push for a new amended proposed statement on the grounds that ds needs have changed. I'm not sure of the legal ins and outs of this though. Personally I wouldn't pull him out as I think they will be quite happy for you to do this. It will then probably be harder for them to put his support back in place (probably TA support has been allocated elsewhere in his absence). If they do exclude him make sure everything is official and start gathering evidence in case you do have to find suitable specialist provision. Is there any scope in persuing a diagnosis? I think that not having a diagnosis makes it easier for your ds to be pushed into PRU provision.

The mainstream school is named on the sm. Dual roll with PRU at the moment.
We will be pushing for more hours and school said they were going to push for extra too. He has just had a change of TA to a mature,experienced one rather than someone just out of college and there was a big improvement - he was a lot happier. If they refuse to have him there full time I will be requesting the reasons in writing. SEN caseworker is meant to be at the AR and I have it in writing from her that school believe that he is 'choosing' the behaviour so that's probably part of the problem . He wants to be there full-time and his friends have been asking where he is. It's the first time he's had friends at school so will be gutted if it all gets taken from him

'school believe that he is 'choosing' the behaviour so that's probably part of the problem ' Cheeky fuckers.