Applying for statement

[worrywortisworrying]

I just had the information pack to apply for a statement for DS. I did not request it, so I can only assume that the school (who have seen him in nursery once) did.

I don't disagree with it, per se, but it would have been nice to know it was coming.

Right now, I am on the verge of tears, contemplating wine (and yes, I KNOW it's only 11:30) and feeling sick to my stomach.

This always happens. Everyone is very positive RIGH UP UNTIL THEY SEE HIM IN ACTION. Then the tune changes completely. I know that this school do not want to accept him. It's almost certain they won't.

Just feeling so damn sad for my son right now

Did the school actually fill in anything?

What a wierd thing to do. I mean it could be very positive, but it is odd that they didn't tell you.

Would the nursery have sent it instead?

Can you ring the LA and ask who requested it. At least you'd know what is going on.

BTW, the school are unlikely to be able to NOT accept him, but you do have to consider how good it is for you and him to send him somewhere he isn't wanted.

Do they not want him or is it more they can't meet his needs (sorry if i'm asking an obvious question)

Thankyou for the quick reply. It is so appreciated.

I doubt it was his nursery. The school (local state) went to see him in nursery, after that their attitude totally changed (can't see me until 13th June) and I know (from the nursery, but off record) that they don't want to accept him in September.

I DID call LA. Apparently a referral from the 'central office' and no notes . I will fill it in anyway, he almost certainly needs 1-2-1 tuition, but I am keen that he has some social inclusion too. His problem isn't intelligence (in fact, he's far too bright for his own good!) but he is a danger to himself and to others and is also a massive distraction in a group setting.

Trouble is, it's only going to get worse if he's excluded from everything and everyone.

thanks again.

with a Statement he is more likely to be included. With a Statement you can chose which school you want him to go to and that school will almost certainly have to admit him, even if it's with 1:1 support.

He's more likely to be excluded without a Statement - so you should be fighting for him to get one.

Wetaugust Thankyou so much for posting. That has made me feel so much better I know we've only applied for a statutory assessment, but I know he needs a statement if he's got any hope of attending school.

It's just the way it's been done (the school haven't mentioned that they were going to do this, and wouldn't speak to me before half term) and I am wondering (given what the nursery has said) they want him to go to a more specialist school.

What worries me about that? My lack of understanding on what a special school could offer... my not wanting to admit there is a serious difference with my son.... my being worried about what it all means for the future....

Right now, I think my main worries are coming from a lack of knowledge and a massive insecurity that we are doing the right thing.

If he needs one to one help then you need to get a statement.
I would suggest talking to the nursery and the school to see who put in the request and ask to see what they have sent in.
You can write a lot of information in the parents views, and can include any independent/or other reports you may have ( a diagnosis letter, any reports from anyone you like really...) that you may want them to consider. Make it like a report so that if you want to highlight something from a report do it by quoting then saying XYZ report page xxxx paragraph y. This was the advice given to me by my parent partnership. Also they told me that the decision to assess is based on whether there appear to be "barriers to learning" despite any help currently being given so this is what you need to be highlighting.

I think its wrong though for you to find out that one has been applied for in this way.

The default setting, even with a Statement, is mainstream. Even children with severe difficulties will be pushed towards mainstream rather than special school.

It's also the right of parents to request mainstream with appropriate support and it's then up to the LA to state why mainstream could not meet your child's needs.

It's nice to think that this is inclusivity in action - but the reality is that special schools are very expensive places to send children to, so the LAs try to avoid it.