Strongly suspect ADHD, but what should I do?

[clare40]

My 4yr old ds is super hyper most of the time, he makes lots of noises, and is very silly that so often he won't/can't conversate properly. He will never justl play with his toys without guidance. At school he is having the same problems but at the moment he goes to a school which is notorious for ignoring SEN. His teacher says he stands out, but thinks it is a developmental delay. The head teacher is the SEN co-ordinator and keeps telling me not to worry, that he is just a "tinker"! I keep wishing they are right, but my gut feeling is he has mild ADHD - mild because he sleeps well and can listen to a book. He doesn't have raging tantrums and he isn't aggressive. He is just silly/hyper 70% of the time!

The problems is my MIL and more importantly my OH do not want to hear there is a problem. They absolutely refuse that he is anything but perfect.
So, what do I do? Wait until there is more of a problem at school? Go against my OH? Can anyone help? Any advice opinions/advice?

Umm, I am not downplaying this at all but he sounds a lot like mt 5yo. AFAIK he has no SEN, just general silliness. Noisy, full of energy, leading to silly movements, inability to concentrate/listen, sometimes refusing to speak properly. He can play with toys though. Apologies if this isn't relevant.

A) ignore your OH. You won't get a dx of ADHD if he doesn't have it. If he does have it a label will help. And the sooner he gets one the better.

B) go to your GP, with DS, and ask for a referral to a child development paed to assess for ADHD. Some places CAMHS diagnoses not a paed.

C) start him on vegepa (omega) and zinc and magnesium. (floradix salyudnum or osteocare)

It's very common for fathers (and schools) to not want to know about SN. But you don't have the luxury of sticking your head in the sand.

It's also very hard to get a dx. I promise you you won't get a dx just based on your concerns. He will only get a label if he really and truly meets the diagnostic criteria.

Obviously it's hard for us to say as we don't know your DS. If you have concerns, get a referral to a paediatrician for possible assessment. They will be able to give you further information.

In the meantime, if he is having difficulty at school tell them he needs support.