A happy thread-The funny things our DC's say.

[thenewmrsdepp]

Ok i'll start.......obviously So DD (5)probably has AS(currently being assessed) and has a wicked little sense of humour, but at the same time will just say it as she sees it. Sometimes it gets us into trouble.

We were at the petrol station yesterday and the lady at the counter said "my goodness, what a pretty little girl you are" to which DD replied "Thank you. You're not though are you. You've got a funny face actually"

I was mortified at the time and just said that she was going through a phase of saying that everyone had a funny face but as soon as I got into the car I burst into hysterical laughter! Of course when I composed myself I explained that what she said was very rude and hurtful, but if we don't laugh we'd cry ey!

Your turn.

Ds (5yo HFA) saw some people playing tennis at the weekend and said "oh that is so sick"

Am delighted appalled he is picking up age-appropriate slang

Friends had taken my DS3 to the local pool with a few other DC. We'd been talking about his birthday party earlier so he comes out with, "I'm having a party but only one person in this car is invited. Sorry xxxxx, it's not you." Accurate but...

Have I said he's a bit quirky?

Ds keeps asking me if I'm going to do pushing and screaming when the baby comes out of my vulva, and can he cut the baby out if it gets stuck,

Every friggin day he asks, at home, on the bus, in the street, in the shop.........

ds1 looked in the bathroom mirror the other day (which doesn't happen often TBH). He looked at his arm pits and shouted 'THERE'S A HAIR!' ( a single black hair had appeared)
I didn't know whether this was going to be a good or a bad thing so wasn't sure how to react so I held my breath...luckily he was quite chuffed with it!

And is it a very big knife they use and will there be lots of blood.

starlight!

He's 5!

aw! he must be so excited

Just keep the knives out of reach!

I dropped Ds ( 15 asd) at his social skills group . I had his younger sister (9 nt) with me.
One of the other boys says to troutboy " Is that your sister ?"
"Yes" says troutboy
" Is she a norm?" asks the other boy
" yup " says troutboy

Made me giggle

DS was deep in his computer game, looked up, and in all seriousness said "look and learn mummy"

I'm thinking that the social skills thing isn't working

Sat with my SIL (who is quite big boned ) she commented that if she fell from a great distance she would make a crater in the ground (due to what had happened on the tv seconds before)..DS looked at her and said "no the hole would be bigger than that because you are really fat!"...intervene me.."DS please don't say that!"...DS "but why its the truth??...She is fat!"....me"yes I know your being truthful ".....made quite a sharp exit at that point , she has avoided me like the plague ever since.

at all of the above!!

I love the very serious comment of "look and learn mummy" signandsmile.

proper, I think you win the most embarassing situation award so far It's terrible when they drag you down with them and you end up agreeing and putting your foot in it too

Just remembered another classic from DD. A few months back we were at Frankie and Benny's(her favourite) and this waiter came over, who was a little on the camp side shall we say.........you can probably see where i'm going with this. So, i've already clocked that DD has realised that he's a little different to most men and is curious to know why. I kept trying to keep her occupied with her drawings and colouring everytime he came over cos I could see where it was going. "Are you ready to order?" and DD looks at him dead in the eye raises herself up off the chair and says "are you a man or a lady? You look sort of like a man, but you sound like a woman". So I said how sorry I was and told her it was rude etc and he answered "it's ok darlin i'm definitely a man, i'm just a bit girly" and then laughs bless him. DD then said "so are you a man pretending to be a lady?" CHEQUE PLEASE!!!!!

DS the last time DH and I took him to macdonalds walks up to two sweet little girls and their posh granny and says

"Hi! my names DS and I can jump! I been excluded from school and my Dad sells guns wanna play?"

(we sell bb guns lol)

trout, that is so funny.

You cant blame them really they must get so fed up of being called the weirdo or the geek.

I know ineedalife!
Half of me was and the other half was
Just once... it was kinda good to hear it going the other way. ..and to hear ds and his friends 'owning' it somehow.
The social skills group seems to be having the wrong effect at the moment. I asked Ds why he doesn't chat with boys at school ( he rarely speaks at school) like he chats at social skills with the asd kids and he rather scathingly said;
"Because the conversation is unintelligent at school. They only talk about music and girls"

When ds was a lot younger a (fairly flat-chested) friend came to visit wearing a top very similar to one I had. Ds looked at it and said' Mummy's got a top like that but hers has got boobies in it .

Ha ha - just realised my name goes well with what I just posted

snorting with laughter at Desperately's last comment...

DS is trying very hard to be polite. I am trying very hard to lose weight.

As a result I received the following gem: "Mummy, you have a very big bottom, but I'm not going to tell you so."

I suppose it's progress of a sort...at least it made sense!