SENCO says...LONG THREAD ALERT

[UnCharteredromaeosaur]

hi all

i'm a bit sick of the sound of my own voice atm, but i need some help in thinking straight about this, so please bear with me (please)

DD is 4.11yrs, in MS has dx of ASD with SP difficulties in all 5 areas. SALT assessment shows 4yr gap in expressive language/vocabulary (8.10yrs+) and non-literal understanding (4yrs).

During our assessment process it was noted that DD has been 'sensitively parented with social interpretation' and although has not shown many traits outside the home, the ones that are presented are very obvious. I take this to mean as she has 2 adult DBs (both of them lived with us for the 1st 2 yrs of her life) and they have (of course adult) g/fs she has always had lots of input for interpretation of the outside world - lots of protection. DS2 works with vulnerable children in a Social Care funded child care setting and has been invaluable with working out coping strategies (damn i'm gonna miss him in Aug when he leaves home) Yes, she is probably 'indulged' maybe even 'spoilt' to some, but hey, she's a special little girl, in more ways than one, now it seems.

She has an IEP, is on EYA+ and has both physical and verbal support to go to the toilet and to eat. She doesn't eat from the snack table at all unless prompted, she doesn't go to the toilet unless prompted.

Fast forward now to a meeting DH and I had yesterday with the SENCO and DD's CT. We've now got the SALT and OT paper reports as well as the dx so since they are planning for Y1 now, CT has been asking for the info to impliment in class.I didn't actually receive the SALT report until the post came yesterday.

We sat round a table, which I had to get out of the corner of the room. SENCO said 'that's a bit formal' I said 'I've got lots of papers to share, isn't it easier to share if they are on a table' SENCO said 'I didn't think we'd be here that long'

We all sat and read the SALT report together, lots of nodding from CT - he remarked on the gap in DDs understanding 'so she talks the talk but really struggles to understand then? that's important to remember' SENCO said 'lots of kids don't listen'

We read the Sensory Profile/Report and Recommendations together too, again lots of nodding from CT.
This report is broken down into 3 sections - Sensory Processing, Modulation, Behaviour and Emotional responses.
SENCO said 'what does vestibular processing mean, never heard of that before' i said 'it's about balance and spacial awareness' SENCO said 'did you have to look that up' i said, 'not the OT explained it to me' SENCO said 'oh right, know a lot about this do you?' but didn't wait for me to answer

there are some strong recommendations as a summary some of which were...

work in small groups or individually SENCO said 'we do that already'

to offer the use of a fidget in class SENCO said 'i've got those in my office'

to use gloves if preferred when painting CT says, 'she does hate getting dirty, never thought of that' SENCO said 'it's a girl thing, they don't want to spoil their clothes'

to use weighted or heavy blankets or lap pads SENCO said 'oohh, what's that all about'

to use rocking as a soothing technique, perhaps a rocking chair in class SENCO said can't have that, she'd trap someone's fingers in it H&S would go mad

to use heavy muscle work to decrease arousal, carrying books, lifting chairs onto tables SENCO said no, we can't have her putting things on tables, we don't that with chairs anymore i said to CT 'Mr X, i think that means if you need anything moving or carrying, get DD to do it, it will help with her acknowledging there is change and physically soothe her' SENCO said 'we can't use children as removal men'

that DD would find crowds and busy areas overwhelming and would struggle to process important information in these situations SENCO said 'how can they say that when she stood up in front of the whole school and did so well in her class assembly' CT said 'she was given a set of lines, she repeated them. her memory for detail is fantastic'

i've come away from this latest meeting with lots of thoughts, and have tried to be as objective in this OP as i can, would anyone like to offer anything up here to help me understand what's going on here?

please?

it's the constant denial that gets me from the SENCO, I've had this too, but from CT too. Not now tho, not now we have dx. at least you have CT onside but have you had a multi agency meeting involving the senco, cos it sounds like she needs to be told her millions of alternative theories are not applicable here. we can all make excuses for our DCs and explain away (some) of their behaviours with this and that theory, but at the end of the day it's not helping them and it's time to face reality as you have as a parent. I think they try and discount the reality cos it means more paperwork for them.

i posted a question on the live chat with KIDS last night, and was advised to ask for that same meeting Jerbil, but since the SENCO has now told me she won't involve the Ed Psych until the Paed Psych 'orders' it (which he tells me he cannot do) their advice is to request SA.

i'm clinging on to the hope that a few letters and calls from the HCPs will be enough to jettison the SENCO into action, i've given her a mental timescale of 2 weeks (until after 1/2 term) to get her ass in gear or it's ton of bricks time.

DH wants to go and look at a school in town that has specific ASD provision, i'm quite trepidatious of this as i think i'll leave there with a huge 'i want' of something probably i can't have

thanks for all your support on this, in the cold light (or rather overbearing heat) of day i realise that this SENCO is out of order, with both her attitude and lack of knowledge of ASD

i took copies of DDs sensory and SALT reports in to her CT this afternoon - said to him 'i wondered how much access you'd have to the copies i brought in the other day'

his gratitude and eagerness to take it from me spoke volumes

this will continue i fear...

all