DD 15 ADHD and ODD her world has collapsed.........

[devientenigma]

..........she has had a relationship with her BF for over 2 year. It ended last night. Obvipusly really hurt as we all would, just can't get through to her the pain will end. She is becoming really angry and aggressive. She is also keep phoning him. I don't know whether to stop her or let this run it's course. I don't know how much would be to do with her ADHD etc. Any advice would be great, TIA x

Oh poor thing.

As you know. Don't have a child that age, but I 'imagine' I woukd let it run it's course. A lot of her behaviours are outlets for her emotions and trying to stop all but the most dangerous might make matters worse.

Aww..
I think maybe let it run it's course.
Poor thing

I think that it is just her age but the ODD/ADHD might be making it harder for her to regulate her emotions about the whole thing. A 2 year relationship is a huge thing when you are only 15.

Poor you and poor her. It is hard watching her and knowing she is hurting so much. I agree with the others though, you need to let her find her own way through it so she can learn how to cope if it ever happens again as well. Hugs to you all! :(

Could combine letting it run it's course with some sensible limits (like perhaps taking her phone away @10pm, only so much credit, listening to her ranting but then locking yourself in bathroom..)

I agree with trying to limit the amount of calls/text she is sending.

I don't know your Dd but my Dd1 has sent some really vile texts to her ex and I don't think she can understand how horrible it is for him to recieve them.

She has no Dx but I am pretty certain she has Aspergers.

Maybe you could try to go out somewhere and do something completely different. I know it won't make her feel better but at least it will keep her brain occupied for a short time, Bless her.

oh bless her heart :(

My eldest suffers anxiety issues, not wanting to be alone etc which stemmed from her father years ago. Shes a lot older now but relationship break ups were the worst.

I would say let it take its course. I dont think there is a happy medium for you. From experience when she was that age she was very vulnerable. If I took dds side and supported her I was ok in the beginning when the tears fell but worst enemy if I said anything against the other half because for a few weeks there was always the lingering thought that it would still be ok and they need time for them to adjust that its just not going to happen so I found there was another nuclear fallout a couple weeks on when reallity hits.

I learnt after huge errors lol to just listen and let dd do the ranting and the talking, nod in sympathy and offer a hug and hot chocolate. I tried to keep her as occupied as possible, got a few of her mates round and let them sleep over and do silly girly things. Mates were better as they always sound off to them better and it takes the pressure off you a little x