DD said school is too noisy. So worried this mainstream thing isn't going to work.

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DD five and a half has been lashing out at school. She is way below the level of her peers in terms of speech, language and understanding and is classed as having severe s and l disorder.

She randomly hits and kicks children but only during busy periods or transition times.

Today I had a bit of a break through as she said "don't like school" (recent thing she can actually talk to this level so they are definately doing some good!) then when I said why she said it too noisy. Now, her speech production is so poor that if she'd said that to school I doubt they would have even understood what she said but I was impressed with how well she expressed herself.

Anyway it has led me to think that she is lashing out due to her sensory issues. An Ot went to school to advise on them but that was post statement and with a different TA who has now left so the OT stuff isn't on the statement.

I have emailed the SENCO asking can DD be given opportunities for quiet time and see if this helps with the behavioural stuff and will speak to the teacher tomorrow but I just feel lost with this, and as if I have no control over things which if handled badly could affect her seriously-she was always going to struggle in mainstream and it terrifies me that the gap will keep widening so much.

Any advice on what I could do? The school are very supportive but I am not sure they have had much help with it as the ed psych was not much use last time.

have you any speech and language units in your county? they are attached to main stream schools but usually only have 10 children in. this will give her a quieter environment, and i think they will cater for her other needs as she is already at a mainstream sch? might be an idea to have a look.
my son has very unclear speech aswell, maybe she could have some cards with clear pictures in for giving to the teacher or the teacher to her when she needs some time out. it doesnt mean she has to stop speaking with the pictures, but the teacher will understand what she is saying. are the 'noisy' times at certain times always? like 1st thing in the morning, getting ready for dinner, comming in after play, home time? if so, this can be easily sorted by her comming in 5mins late so the majority of children are already engaged in their table work and the cloakroom is quieter, she could get ready for home just before the mad coat and bag rush and just sit with a book at her seat whilst the rest of the class get ready? the same with other transition times.
you probably have done all of these things, sorry if i am teaching you to suck eggs!

Anespesto thank you taht all sounds great, I know DD does some of that but just am not sure how much one to one time she is actually getting above the fifteen hours this term as they are busier now. So worried about tomorrow I know it will be hell to get her there and I will worry all day-the thought of her not being able to say if she feels stressed.They are going to have to change something while they wait for the 30 hours to be sorted though I think- I know last week they said they would offer quiet time I think I will have to go in again tomorrow and ask how it is going-sohard to know what actually goes on in a day. I am tempted to go and get her and take her home for lunch but I am worried it would be a nightmare since its transition times she hates.

mummytofive there is no s and l unit in the aea, it is something I have been really upset over and have met with head of SEN services to express my disappointment-long story but it really is what she needs. Yes they have noticed its transition times and are sending her ahead for things like lunch,washing hands etc. Today she was saying lunch time scary snacktime scary its so nlike her she loves her food and has always been so sociable! I think cards she hands to the teacher is a good idea and will suggest that tomorrow thank you.

I really am worried about the rest of this term as it is a busy one in the Foundation stage unit, I wonder if there is any way of getting the extra hours pushed through faster-I think I wasted the annual review now and think I may need to ask for another meeting to find out exactly what is happening there.

i sit with my ds when his teacher isnt in at lunch as he can choke easily, although its just his class, it is noisy! and can be very daunting. when the rest of the school have lunch it reminds me of mcdonalds, children queue at the hatch, others sitting eating, others getting up... it can look very chaotic. can your dd eat nearer the door so she knows as soon as she finishes then she can leave? I think the school should be able to free some cash for 1:1 for dinner time, maybe out of the predicatable needs fund. I cant remember if your dd has a statement, but it looks like she needs support at dinnertime for lunch and using playtime for helping with social skills. the ed psyc told me my ds sticks to adults as they take more time to try and understand him so wants them to use playtime as an opportunity to build on these.
summer term is mad with sports, jubilee celebrations, ountings etc. maybe they can help your dd with a daily timetable in pictures.
i really feel for you, we have just had my ds proposed statement, and sadly i dont think the speech part will get us a place at the local speech unit, but am meeting with the head this week to go through it and will keep my fingers tightly crossed. just an idea, but do you have a private school in your county with a speech unit attached? when our local unit gets full, some dc in our town have had this funded through the lea.

She has a statement but only fifteen hours one to one-they have applied for 30 to cover lunch as well. They do a visual timetable I THINK but will ask again. I just get the impression it has suddenly got hectic with the extra children and dd's old TA leaving and they haven't kept up with stuff so much. Re lunch time though dd had a funny turn/fit just before easter and I arrived at lunch to take her home, it wasn't that hectic as they stagger them rather than all eating at once but I will ask if this has changed since the extra children. And maybe its the play time that she thinks is scary. Can't bear the thought of that for her even for tomorrow, maybe I should see how they feel about me going there rather than trying to take her home for lunch although am due DC two in next couple of weeks and don't want to start something that will be hard to keep up-will just say how worried I am and see what they come up with I think.

Good luck with the speech and lang unit, you could ask for changes to the statement perhaps if you haven't already? I questioned some bits of ours and the statementing officer changed them.

We don't even have a private school that is suitable for dd-just two autism and communication bases that supposedly cover both s and lang and autism but don't have any chuldren dd's age.

Am going to look around the local special school on wed. I am worried sicj that this is what I should have done a year ago and we have now moved here to be near the school she is at-its a five min walk and so convenient but I now feel really stupid that I didn't realise how hard mainstream would be for DD. I was just so focussed on my anger at the lack of a s and l unit and thought DD would not be suitable for special school-the reality is that may have been the better place for her.

Lovely teacher took photos of DD having a lovely time at lunch time today-and some photos of the routine of it, dinner lady etc for me to go over with her at home. Feel so much better aout it although I know we may have hard times with year one and it in no way changes the fact that ss may be best for the future.

Good luck at the SS tomorrow. Are you still going?

Thank you yes I am as think long term we will be looking at a ss so good to get an idea. Also there is a holiday club there and its run by the after school club so I am looking there after with a view to putting dd in one day a week over the summer holidays, thought it may be a good start.