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2 questions. sleeping habits and routines

14 replies

Chundle · 12/05/2012 20:56

Hi all! Struggling with dd2 at the mo (2.9). She's a crap sleeper and on melatonin. It seems to me she's highly anxious around sleeping and needs us there with her so she feels safe. Doesn't matter if she sleeps with us or we sleep on floor in her room as long as we are there she will settle down. Are your kids like this and anxious around sleep and how do you fix it??

Also, she's very pineckty about things! Every morn dh gets her up. He's always ready for work on a weekday but dd doesn't understand this and screams 'work jumper on' at him on a weekend when he's in his dressing gown! It gets her very upset and in a right state as he hasn't got his work jumper on like he does on a weekday!! We can cope with her having to sit at same dinner place and same seat on sofa but this is a new one and it drives me insane!!!

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bialystockandbloom · 12/05/2012 21:13

Not sure about sleep problem, but for the other problem, do you think she'd understand a visual calendar?

You could make a very, very simple days of the week calendar, with a couple of pictures for each day. The pictures could be of you/her/dh/family, doing the things that you do each day. So if I was doing one for my dd (2.6) I'd do:

Monday - pic of ds going to school (in uniform, carrying book bag), pic of dh in work clothes. Pic of me and dd at park
Tuesday - same as above but dd at nursery
Wednesday - as above but me & dd at dancing
etc
Then Saturday - pic of all of us in morning, dh in normal clothes, then all of us going out for the day

Sorry a bit rambling but hope you get the idea!

Every morning when you get her up, look at the calendar together and say "oh today is xxxday and today daddy will be going to work and wearing his work jumper!" Then at the weekend you do the same but "oh it's Saturday so daddy will be at home, and look he's wearing his jeans/whatever"

Could also try looking at it last thing at night, and showing her what will be happening tomorrow (if you think she understands 'tomorrow?).

Obv she's a bit young to understand days of the week as such, but her need for control about this might subside if she's prepared in advance about what is happening that day, and knows what's coming. Lots of anxiety, and hence insistence on routine/familiarity, happens when a child isn't prepared, doesn't know why the 'rules' change, why something is like x on one day but y on another. Visual aids great for helping this.

Chundle · 12/05/2012 21:28

Thanks bialy fab idea!! She started to talk after using pecs so she's pretty good with symbols I shall get making in the morning!

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HotheadPaisan · 12/05/2012 22:44

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HotheadPaisan · 12/05/2012 22:51

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Chundle · 13/05/2012 06:58

Thanks hot I will have a look at schramm today, is it a book?

She does have very bad seperation anxiety not sure why I didn't tie the two together! Glad your ds is more settled now it gives me hope!

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HotheadPaisan · 13/05/2012 08:06

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Chundle · 13/05/2012 09:08

Great thanks for that hot. It is very demanding as we can't leave her with anybody. Luckily we get three hours a month enabler so me and dh can get out

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HotheadPaisan · 13/05/2012 09:19

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HotheadPaisan · 13/05/2012 09:21

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HotheadPaisan · 13/05/2012 09:33

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Chundle · 13/05/2012 09:41

Thanks for that hot. Although dd sees a pead I can't see her getting dx until ages older unless we go private everything is slow on the nhs! We have no family that live near us so the 3 enabling hours a month are a godsend!

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HotheadPaisan · 13/05/2012 11:12

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HotheadPaisan · 13/05/2012 11:14

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Chundle · 13/05/2012 13:21

We are currently awaiting an ados test which seems to be taking forever. Waiting for Daphne keens secretary to get back to us too which also seems to be taking forever!

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